So, last week was one of those shows where I had to face what was going on in my life as I blogged. Yes, it is hard to know that I am in the same boat as a woman who is beautiful as hell….and know that she will get a relationship before me. And not to mention that the entire week was filled with a ton of relationship challenges….the guys that I came in contact with last week challenged me to the core.
With all of that being said…. I hope that this week’s episode does NOT make me look inside of myself. Well, let’s go.
Take 2 in 5, 4, 3, 2, 2, 2, 2, #Diamond
I know that I just said Take 2 above…..but that was Thursday when I thought I was ready to write this. So, to say that I am late in writing this would be an understatement. I am sooooooooo sick that it is not even funny. I hate spring and I hate that if I think about getting sick…..I am down for 3 weeks. So, to everyone who was looking for this to be posted on Friday, my deepest apologies. Please know that I have been well medicated, dehydrated, and plain knocked the hell out and preparing for Easter Sunday. I would have rather been writing this.
Now that it is Sunday and I just woke up from a coma after church at 10pm after only an hour or so of sleep from last night…yadda yadda, yadda….I figured I could write this before The Borgias came on.
Take 2 (Literally) in 5, 4, 3, 2, 2, 2, 2, #AllWhite
Okay, so Lisa Raye is running her first 5k marathon for the Susan G Komen: Race for the Cure. Hmmm…. I will take Lisa Raye’s cue and I will begin to condition myself to run my first 5k marathon all the way through by spring races in 2012. I think that is a believable time frame, right? And so does her trainer not have a last name?
Okay, so remember the cousin that lost the suitcase? Isnt that her assistant? Why have we not seen her since they have returned from Puerto Rico? Did she fire the poor girl? And truth be told….. karma is a bitch. Because watching all of those reruns of that episode Lisa Raye did joke about her cousin losing her bag and boasting about how she had hers. And in several shots when the fans are taking pics….the Louis V suitcase is visibly in the background, and not even Lisa Raye is near the bag, but….I digress.
Now, on to this new stylist. Wait, back up. Joe eXclusive……I don’t know if his outer appearance would have made me trust him enough to even give him an opportunity to dress me, but I guess I could learn not to judge a bargain basement book by its cover. What? You thought that just because it was Easter that I would be easy on him? BWAHAHAHAHAHAH! You know better. Okay, back to this new stylist. Her name is Okera. She pronounces is Oh-k-ear-ah. Cute. Too close to okra to keep my humor in tact. BUUUUUUUT!
I love her mother’s house….the little bit that we got to see. And the dog, Diamond…is so cute. Now, if i could get my dog, Stanely Blu to give a high-five he will be the coolest dog in the neighborhood…lol. Right now he’s smart, but too smart for his own good…lol. Wow… how about I am just now learning about Circle of Promise….wait, no, I take that back. I remember Gabrielle Union mentioned it on The Mo’Nique Show. My Aunt Sharon, is a survivor of breast cancer… so to watch this episode hits home for me, too. Now, Lisa Raye putting on make-up to run a race continues to remind me that there will be something that I dont understand about her in every episode….lol. I guess it is a celebrity thing. But I do see Lisa Raye caring for her make-up artist touched me so very much. THAT is not a celebrity thing, that is a human thing. Those are moments that I love to see in Lisa Raye.
Man, I am watching them run and I am wondering….why are they running so damn fast!!! Slow it down people… I am getting tired just watching them. I would do what I call the “fat girl shuffle”, that’s more of an accelerate walk …less of a jog yet more than a walk. But I applaud her for her effort. Lawd….did I promise to be able to do that by next Spring? YEA!!!!!!!!! Lisa Raye finished the race!!!!!!!! That really touched me. Okay… so yes, I can do it! Well… I learned a ton from this episode….can’t wait for the next.
So, today I feel HORRIBLE! I think that death came and raped me last night and left me with all kinds of illnesses…lol. All curable, of course, but still illness just the same. My head hurts, ear is throbbing, TMJ on the brink of world domination…you name it, I’ve got it. So I went to work late and left early. I slept from 4:30pm until around 11:30pm……and I woke up so that I could blog about the Real McCoy. So y’all better appreciate this mess!
Take 2 in 5, 4, 3, 2, 2, 2, 2, #Lights,Camera,Diamond
Okay… sooooo there is something to be said about how sick I am. I forgot to set my DVR and sooooo I have to wait until later today for it to come back on. I apologize for being late, y’all. Blame it on death and not my heart…lol.
So, I have been sick all day, I slept, worked from home for a minute, went back to sleep and woke up in enough time to catch it at 3pm.
Well, Well, Well. I need to find out more information about Divas Simply Singing event and The Diva Foundation founded by the all around diva herself, Sheryl Lee Ralph. This is the first time that I have ever heard of this event, and what a great way for me to do it. I have a great suggestion for the organization and I wonder if I can get it to her. But for those who have not watched this show yet,Divas Simply Singing is an event that raises funding, provides testing, and information for AIDS/HIV testing.
And I get the whole entire scene with Lisa Raye crying when Sheryl talks about finding her blessing in her husband, Vicent. Sheryl said that people have to stop saying that there are no good men out there in the world and begin to understand that you just havent come across yours. And the whole” we can be Betty White” joke when Lisa Raye said that she isn’t getting any younger stung. This week of all weeks is NOT the week that I needed to watch this particular episode. I understand why Lisa cried, I wanted to cry too. I feel like every time I lift my head up I am hearing another guy tell me that I am not what he is looking for. I have heard every reason in the book. So Lisa Raye, honey, when you want to cry again…call me and I’ll bring Ben & Jerry…lol. We’ll both find our guy one day while our ovaries are still functioning….at least mine.
Now, the two of them heading over to the Shawn MacKenzi Agency to see a matchmaker made me cry laughing. So, does Jasmine Diaz, the matchmaker, ask everyone the same questions, or was that asked just for the show? But, I must disagree with Lisa about money being the top of my list. But again, she and I are two different people, so I can’t judge it…. I just don’t agree or understand it. I agree whole heartedly, the size of the penis does not matter to me as long as you have enough not to pee on your nuts but enough to work it. Too much penis looks nice, but it hurts and is useless, so men need to get that out of their minds. Only loose women, women who started off with huge penises, and damaged women actually like the gigantic penises. And I know they will tell me otherwise, but I want what works for me…and huge doesn’t work for me. Wait… did Lisa just say that she wake Quincy up every day….naked? lmao! All that view wasted on a gay man. The world is so cruel…lol.
Now….WHAT the hell is Joe eXclusive?!!!! People actually let that man look like that? I mean, I am all for self-expression, but self-destruction… your friends need to produce an intervention!!!! This blonde hair and nails on this highway tar black man is not working for me. An amber brown is the lightest that he should EVER go. But who am I to judge…again…I just dont get it.
Okay, so….Lisa Raye is at Meso Solutions to get her cupping done. She has all of these cups on here and they suck the fat cells up to the surface to erase the cellulite dimples that appear. And she even got a butt lift, naturally with this suction action. Hmmm….let me google how much this technique actually costs…..brb. Boo, hiss. I was able to find spas who do it, but no price was included. Moving on.
I loved how Lisa Raye helped to raise money for The Diva Foundation. It was hilarious to watch her make people give money into the hat, auction style. I saw B. Scott through the curtain, the guy who played John Coffee, and many more. It makes me wonder can regular people come to this event as well. Hmmmm… Is that Omarosa?
On to the date. WOW! Okay, so she is like me. I, too, hate roses. But can I get a guy who wants to send me a lilly…hell, a flower period. J. Alexander Martin, the owner of FUBU is Lisa Raye’s blind date. And he has never been married, and doesn’t have any children running around and he is sitting there waiting for Lisa Raye. HOLD THE HORSES! J. Alexander said that he loves Lisa Raye because she is a sign of the women from his generation; she is ghetto and bourgsie (sp). But for Lisa said that it is easier for men to eat sushi because they eat pussy all the time….smdh. I swear, why can she get away with saying stuff like that? And J.Alexander is the perfect gentleman from what I saw. I wish that there were more guys like him floating around in my area. And if there are….where can I find them? *Sigh* See, this show hit too close to home this week. LAWD!!! Give me something that I can judge and criticize…lol. I have more fun judging….lol.
Okay, this was a great episode, something that I needed to see. But it does remind me of What Chili Wants….lol
Okay, so…. is it normal for two episodes to come back to back or is it just because it is the season premiere? Either way, I am enjoying watching
Take 2….Literally!
Okay. I am understanding the interview portion with Jackie Reid.
Quincy’s face is hilarious when she said “homo” bag…lol. Okay, now when Lisa Raye must have the STRONGEST ankles in the world for her to double dutch in 4 inch heels!!! lol. Patrick ( the housekeeper) cracked me up jumping rope. But hell… she did it!!!! Let my ass try that shit. All kinds of joints would be broken and fractured.
Okay, she said that she needs to put on her work wig? Umm… have we seen Lisa Raye’s real hair? And by real I mean not purchased, borrowed with a follicle origination from her scalp. I mean, she is beautiful either way, in my eyes, but……what does she look like unaltered?! I digress.
I am really, really loving her wanting to take on action. Now, I must be honest… I am going to need to see her not playing a damsel in distress. LLS!!!! Her with this huge ass wig on is killing me!!!!!! It is so funny!!! I didnt know that she was this corny yet comical! She is hilarious!!! hahahahah I love it! Her combat training was fun to watch. I really do hope that she sticks with it.
LMAO!!! Quincy said that he was forced to be there. LMAO!!! As soon as Lisa found out that the BBs could hit her in the face she about changed her damn mind. lol. She said ” Now look, I work with my face.” Well, this is what you decided to do to train. Angelina wouldnt care. She would have hopped right in and kept it moving. Sooooooo get to it , woman! Leh Go! Hell… I want to go to CQB‘s training facility!!! They are making this look so fun!!!
hahahah Lisa said that Tom fell like baby Huey!! hahahahahah They didnt cover a “man down” situation..lol. HILARIOUS!!!
ANOTHER JEAN LINE?!
Dear Celebrity, can you please market other items that we, as a community, need? Just asking.
Okay, I understand that she needs a line for people with booties. And as a chronic sufferer and the CEO of Donk Deficiency Anonymous, I do not feel her pain. BUT, I do know that there is a market for people who need jeans to fit. So, I am not knocking your hustle…. just saying that we have seen this hustle remixed more times than Diddy appears on his artists’ tracks.
Yes, I am laughing, just a little at the flat assed girl on the front row. I’m not pointing her out… just know that when you see it, or if you saw it… you will know. LMAO!!! I love the White girl with the ass. hahahah Lisa Raye had to ask her if she was white…hahaha. Priceless! Wait, did this girl just do a toe-touch after her number was called? smdh. Man, I am really hating that this white girl has more ass than I do. lol.
Next Week: Umm… the whole date situation and her commentary. SMDH. I’ll save my thoughts for next week!
Who knew that I could make it this far? I know for damn sure that I didn’t think that I could make it for 18 days straight. I honestly think that I am in for a treat since I am sticking to this. I really don’t think that I have that much of a noticeable physical change…well outter change. Like, yeh O lost some inches but it depends on how I stand, when I measure and yadda yadda yadda. My weight has gone down from 232 to 227.5 and that is good. But I honestly think that I still look the same. I know that I have 12 more days before I take my next pics, but a lot can and cannot happen in 12 days. I am just afraid that I will have done all of this hard work just to get the pics and look the same. Am I expecting to be a size 6 in a month? No, but I am looking for my stomach not to stick out as much as it did before I started.
I wish the internal changes could show. Like, how I actually like working out now, or how I understand the importance of stretching and ab control and am working to be better at it. How jumping jacks with these huge ass breasts don’t give me a black eye and a heart attack like they use to. Or how I consider each workout my own personal challenge that I can accomplish, and when it is complete, I am very proud of myself. This is what I wished showed in my before and After pics.
Well, I didn’t wake up and workout like I thought that I would. I went to bed TOO late after the movie screening and exercise that I really needed to stay my butt in bed for the entire day. I brought my lunch of chicken and broccoli to work…and yummm! I walked to get lunch with my co-worker and it was torture to stand in the buffet doorway and smell all of the wonderful foods that I use to partake in oh so long ago. It was amazing, though, to see the different combinations of food on people’s plates. The slimmer people were piling the salad and vegetables high and cutting the fish filets in half ( I have always wondered who in the hell does that!). While the more Boss Hog crowd was slamming three scoops of Mac & Cheese into containers that were big enough to feed those children on late night TV. I never once saw the Boss Hog crowd find their way to the vegetable table unless to drip dressing over a few chicken wings, and though exaggerated…..its not by much. I had survived the temptation ( with the help of leaving my debit card in the office) and I ate my healthy lunch and drank my water. Around the afternoon I started craving a soda….I fought the urge so hard that it wasnt even funny. My body wanted that beverage BAD!!!! But I wasnt ready to put on empty calories. So I went and got a snickers…..lol.But, I came home, watched When in Rome with one of my personal assistants/mentee and then I dreaded working out. I mean…it hit me that today was Yoga day! Yes, a damn Yoga day!!! I was procrastinating so much that I even played the disc on fast forward for her with my own fat girl commentary as if I were at the Hamburger Olympics! It was soooo hard for me to get up to take her home because I knew I had to workout when I returned.
Once back in the house, I knew that this was going to be the hardest 1.5 hours in my life. I mean really…. did Yoga really have to be this long? It really was the 1.5 hour time frame that was throwing me off. In the car I had joked that I would turn the radio on in order to make it through….well…thats what I did. I turned on my favorite radio stations, WKYS 93.9 and I jammed out to Daija Perez with my back to the TV as he called out the poses. I was even tempted to tape the TV screen to cover the timer but just didnt look in that direction. There were times when I would glance at the screen but would block the timer corner with my hand just so I could see what move was next. It was not as bad as usual. Knowing the time ACTUALLY messes up my mental capacity to tell myself I can get through it. I have no clue why…. but it does. I made it through the first hour and then…by honest accident….I saw that I only had 34 minutes left. It was then that I was proud of myself. It really did help to do downward dog to Keri Hilson’s Breaking Point or Warrior Pose to Jazmine Sullivan’s Count to 10. But nothing beats doing Tree to Michael Jackson’s Liberian Girl!!!!!! I was trying to stay still but my neck had to move in a snake-like fashion to feel the groove…and I still kept my balance! lol. I learned that maybe I am missing out on the quietness of traditional Yoga, but maybe traditional Yoga isn’t for everyone. Maybe people need Country Yoga with Taylor Swift sending subliminal messages to Kanye in the background through twanged out mantras (Yummmmmmm). Or Rap Yoga with Gucci man teaching the class telling everyone to find their inner Buuuuuuuuur! I would prefer R&B/Neo-Soul Yoga…it connects well with my inner balance. Maybe I need to do it to instrumentals to take away the words and focus on the point of traditional Yoga….but this is what works for me to get the exercise done. And it was successful! I made it through the ENTIRE P90X Yoga X video for the first time EVER!!! The only time I stopped was on moves that I could not do; crane and side hold thingy with only one arm and one leg touching the floor.
So, it can be done. I will keep experimenting with this….especially since next week is my first recovery week and I saw Yoga twice….lol. But it felt good to accomplish something that I once hated tremendously and now I just dislike. lol.
Episode 1: My Intro to Lisa Raye
Season 2-
~*2Deep*~ Uncensored! 