200 Men Said….OPEN THE DAMN DOOR!

So, by now I pray that you have read my blog called “You Killed Chivalry, You Bastard!”. If not, I suggest you head on over there and get to reading so you can know where this stems from. Don’t worry… we won’t wait for you to return, but the blog will still be here when you do.

Now, as I mentioned in last month’s blog, (You Killed Chivalry You Bastard, Pt 1)YKCYB for short, I HAD to take this to my 200 Men, it wouldn’t have been right for me to take my “I am Woman Hear Me Roar” stance without consulting the world’s top male perspective…lol. Buuuuuuuut I must confess, they don’t know why I asked them. I pretty much assume that they think that every question I ask them is something that has personally happened to me. Boy, they must think I am jacked up. Well, the truth of the matter is, not all of what I ask has happened to me, and I hold the key to which of it has……and judging by YKCYB, this one happened to me. But, like I said…..I didn’t need for my 200 Men to know that from the jump. I wanted their pure and honest answer on the situation, without me swaying what asshole did to provoke me to ask the question in the first place. I must say, my 200 men never let me down.

So, I asked the following question:

Do you, as a man, think that a man should open all car doors for a female….no matter if she is a driver or passenger? And should he ALWAYS open these doors?

And they came back with…… (Warning, I do not edit or proofread majority of their responses…lol):

Writer’s Block: Tsion the Wordsmith~Miss Valentine

        Okay, so….this topic will NEVER get old to me. It is a topic that is close to my heart. And I can’t say much about it in this intro because it would spoil the read. So…..

        I called in a  favor to a real good friend of mine, Tsion the Wordsmith, and I asked him if he could send me a copy of this poem. Tsion and I slammed on the 2009 Busboys and Poets 11th Hour Slam Team together…and this would become one of my favorite poems. I mean, the way that he sets it up to the way that the story unfolds….beautiful. And of course I plan to tell him this one day… but I dont want his head to get bigger than what it already is. LMAO! But, I called him as soon as I sent out the question for my 200 Men because it was the FIRST thing that came to mind. I wanted local DC, Maryland, and Virginia talent to be showcased for this particular topic. Plus…. I get to expose you all to some of my amazing friends and their talents. I could talk about it for hours, but I would rather you read it first. Enjoy!

Miss Valentine by: Tsion the Wordsmith

It was a Thursday…
and I was on the corner of 14th and Lennox listening to a crackhead preach about how we was all sinners and needed Jesus
now I wasn’t paying him no mind, just indulging his conversation
growing impatient though cause I had my eye on this bar named “Susie’s”
owned by a Jamaican  whose name was…
well, I don’t think nobody really know what his name was
I finished up talking, walked across the street went into the bar
and heard a voice say, “you gonna have the paul mason straight?”
surprised me cause that’s the thing I would drink whenever I went into the place…
then from around the corner walked the prettiest face I had ever seen
if looks were skills then she would have been the captain of the dream team; and the first at that
plus she had a body to match
for real, this woman was a killer
if looks could kill she would be number one on America’s most wanted list
gliding and swaying across this plane; every now and then she would kiss it with her presence

so, she slid up in front of me and said, “I know I surprised you by knowing what you like to cop
but I know you also only come in here on Thursdays and you always sit in the same spot
easy, cause you been coming in here for about six months and two weeks
and I hope its not too conceited but I’m the best looking thing in here and you never once decided to speak
maybe you didn’t notice me cause I was in the antibody crowd and it’s kinda hard to notice anybody when antibodies are hanging
but if anti-bodies are hanging around anybody, it should let you know something is bound to go down
cause antibodies only hang around anybody when somethings going down”
….I didn’t understand one word said; but she told me that was alright cause i would before the night was over
told me her name was Susie and asked, “what’s yours young soldier?”
I told my name was Tsion and asked was she the Susie that ran the place
yeah was the reply and I found it funny cause I would never put that name to that face
she told me it was her daughter’s name and she did it in her memory
“no matter where I go or what I do, she will always be here with me”
so I asked her real name but she brushed me off cause she had other customers to attend to
figured I head through my Thursday ritual of four drinks and head back to the capitol
when I heard “that’s it young soldier, you just gonna speak?
you not gonna ask a pretty young lady out to eat?”
I had a couple dollars to spare so yeah, we could go out for a bite to eat
but before we go, she said she had a couple of her white blood cell buddies she needed to meet
I guess she did some time and her cellys were white
they must cut each other, bonded and became blood sisters for life
so we met up with them and I was still thinking what exactly, what is her name
I asked and with a wicked grin she said “Maylene”
but I figured that really wasn’t her name
but she said if a rose were called by anything else would it still not smell the same…
…true….true…

well, we made it back to my place and before I could the key in the door her lips were on mine
her arms were around my shoulders, and my hands on her behind
the whole time thinking exactly what is the name that her mother gave
I asked her again and she said “call me dominatrix for tonight you will be my slave”
slave to my motion, slave to my track, slave to rhyme, slave to my kat
and it ain’t bother me cause I figured it would be the best I ever had
so when she told me she would be with me for the rest of my life, all I could do is laugh
at my good fortune; saying if only I could believe everything you say as true
she said you can for what I’m about to give you, there is no cure
so jump aboard and ride this ride, but remember lil boy it’s best when you do it rawhide

so we started stroking…
and she wasn’t lying when she said she knew what she was doing
losing my on ecstasy street by the way she was moving
her kitty kat walls
it’s like they grew claws and pulled me in
had my back arching and bending in ways that I never knew it could bend
blending the lines between fantasy and reality until there was nothing left but she and I
and I was trying to maintain composure but it was like with each little stroke I would die
and go to heaven; never wanting to come back, wanting to stay embedded between her thighs
and I figured since I was a real man I had to give her at least 45 minutes of good loving
but after 12 she stroked me real hard and I cried out and filled her with my seed for a thousand tomorrows…

at that point, I was out of breath…
laid my head on the pillow, felt something moving, looked over, this woman was getting dress
so I jumped up, threw on my pants as she was running down my hall
called out real loud “can I have your name and possibly your number so I can give you a call?”
she laughed out loud the biggest laugh I had ever heard in my life and said “little boy, you ain’t been paying attention at all
you don’t need my name or number, imma be with you for the rest of your life; for tonight I made you one of my white blood cell buddies
but if you must know my name is Hazel Irene Valentine…
but you can call me H I V…

 

        So, what’d you think? I thought that this was a clever display of wordplay placed in a realistic setting and hidden behind an obvious epidemic. I think that as a society we have become complacent when it comes to the awareness of the preventable. And not just HIV/AIDS, but in life in general. I love how this was placed from a male’s point of view as seldom do we as a community get the opportunity to hear how men are exposed. This has become a woman’s disease, if you believed the media. They make women responsible for knowing their status. They blame DL brothers for keeping it going. So at what point do we blame everyone for their actions?

        Of course I had to do my own research, so I asked my 200 men what they thought about the topic. And you would die from shock based on what you read. So, come back tomorrow and read what they had to say in 200 Men Said….Get Tested.

Sincerely,

~*My Mother’s Daughter*~

CD Baby: The Diary of a Reluctant Poet

Reverbnation: Tsion the Wordsmith

200 Men Said….Liars, and Fires, and Men….Oh MY!

        If you read my post yesterday about Marsha Ambrosius’ I Hope She Cheats On You, then you should be more than well prepared to know what today’s blog will be about. You guessed it; Cheating! Well, not just cheating in general but all of the things that hurt people do to others while in a relationship.

        You know the drill; boy meets girl, boy sleeps with girl, boy cheats on girl, girls gets even, girl sleeps with best friend, etc, etc, etc. Yeh. If you are above the age of 16 and have a single cool bone in your body then you know exactly what I am talking about. Sorry, this blog is not for the 40 year-old virgins who play Scrabble by themselves while watching reruns of Golden Girls in their studio apartments. NO, this is for the cool kids who know how to get even. Those kids who actually got asked out on dates and thought it was a privilege. The same kids who would soon find out that we are in an age where no one knows how to date or even respect themselves, yet alone how to protect someone else! Yes, those kids.

       I, dear friends, was one of THOSE kids. The cool kid that experienced every wrong in the book. I’m one of the divas with the sunroof open, windows do, and blaring I Hope She Cheats On You. No hurt feelings, just vindication at its finest, displayed beautifully by Marsha’s amazing talents.

       So, as usual, i wanted to know…or even see for that matter…what my 200 men thought on the matter. I wanted to first see what they would admit to doing. So I asked them:

What was the WORSE thing, as a man, that you have ever done to a woman while in a relationship?

 

And the answers that followed were:

• MR. LOVING: I can’t find anything that I can recall! [2deep: Suuuuuuuure! lol]
•  Carlos V: cheated
•  ! Robert D (S4D (S-4411): GAVE MY HEART [2deep:  OUCH!!!!!]
•  Boozer101: cheated… she didn’t find out but just the same.. that’s the worse thing I’ve ever done
•  Lighta: Revenge cheat would have to be the worst thing.
• JAY D:  Cheat on her
•  Nigi “Pistol Star” Pu Yi: The 5th [2Deep:  I have a feeling that there will be a ton of this….lol]
• Patrick:  Not giving the affection she needed or deserved. [2Deep:  You do know that this is worse than cheating, right?]
•  Lateef25: maybe i wasnt honest
• Juan D: smashed her friend. [2deep: Hope it itched….lol]
•  Code Name Bigsexy: lol ill have to use my fifth amendment on that 1 [2Deep: You already told me… so I know…lmao! I just wont post it.]
• DSMILEY1: Had sex with a girl while my girlfriend at the time was next door to a friend’s house. I WAS JUST STUPID AT THE TIME BUT NEVER WILL DO IT AGAIN [2Deep:  JUST STUPID!!! I hope you caught something. Oh wait, you didnt do this to me….never mind…lmao]
•  Parrish M: I couldn’t say that I was a man at the time more like an adult male. I put my hands on a woman before. [2deep: Check out my Blog About D.O.C……..yeh]
• rroyallty: hmm. not sure. maybe break up with her
• Johann J: I cheated on her with her best friend and her best friends cousin. A real young and dumb move. [2Deep: Just a regular overachiever, aren’t we?]
• Robert P: Wasn’t there for her when she needed me most
• Tori A: Cheated on her [2Deep:  Let me guess… you cheated….lmao!]
• James F: had sex with her cousin or kickin her out the car and she had to find a another way home [2Deep:  I’m ready to come whoop your ass my damn self. WHO DOES THAT SHIT?!]
•  kuerby E: cheat…..
•  Ryu C-Keyz:  probably cussed her out and walked off for the night. Hey, I’m the type you snap at me, I snap back. I don’t sit back and take it.
•  Allen Ozark:  nothing. I am the world’s last remaining humanist and a perfect gentleman. i have a universal dimmer switch that only works one way – brighter and brighter – wear your shades baby, wear your shades. [2deep: *side eye* *raised eyebrow*]
• Terrance L:  cheated sexy, what about you as a woman in a relationship [2Deep:  Negro, this isn’t about me…lol]
•  Mr. U. G. Bilbo: The worse thing I’ve done was flirted with another woman and got her number while my girlfriend was around me
•  Ed M:  talk back; being a smart ass [2Deep: Was this your mother? lmao….you are allowed to be a smart ass.]
•  Mr.Swaggtastikal:  I LIED AND TOLD MY EX THAT I WAS STILL WORKING WHEN I KNEW I GOT FIRED…. [2deep: It wasnt so bad to be fired… it’s the fact that you lied that made it bad. CONFESS MAN!!!]
• *~ MR SPONTANEOUS ~PEACE*!!: Betrayed her by not telling her i was still legally married but has been separated for over a year….. [2Deep: I shall remain silent…..but know I am thinking something]
• ~Taylor Gang~Jay Kahlifa:  cheat….and that was the biggest mistake i ever made in my life [2Deep:  I’m sorry… the bitter bitches couldn’t hear you. Could you please speak up. lol]
• 6’5 & NICE WIT IT: GAVE THE DUMMY A CHANCE TO BE IN A RELATIONSHIP [2Deep:  Playing devil’s advocate here… but what does that make you for giving the chance? lmao! j/k]
• corey: fake the big O.lol [2Deep:  Can guys even do this? WHY? I applaud you for evening admitting it. lmao!]
• Ddouble R: put [her] out of my car with her bags in tow at the Maryland house. [2deep: *Researches Marland House…… YOU DROPPED HER OFF AT A REST STOP LOCATED IN THE CENTER OF I-95?!!!!!! I HOPE YOU GET HIT BY TRAFFIC!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *wooosah* Okay… this was in the distant past…. I hope.)

        Okay… so there are a ton of cheating guys running around. KEEP HOPE ALIVE LADIES!!!! *Turns on Disney movies* I mean really… I was done at a guy admitting to faking an orgasm. I mean… what purpose would that serve? Did she find out that he faked the orgasm? Did you tell her that you came? How horrible was she sexually that you had to fake it? Was she ugly? Was she loose and you found out one it was time to lay it down and it turned you off? DId you fake it to speed up the process? Oh shit, I am way off topic… .but that one stumped me. lmao

 

        Also, I see that there are a ton of simple bitches walking along the highway. It would have been a Chris Brown Rhianna situation going on in that car if a negro EVER tells me that I have to get out and walk. He would have to physically put me out and then I am pressing charges and causing a scene. Who does that?!!!! *blood boiling* I know I asked for honesty…. but damn it I got it. Just ticks me off. So… to help me get over this part, I asked them to tell me this:

What was one of the WORST things that a female has done to you while in a relationship? How did it make you feel?

See ladies, I was fair….lol. The fellas said:

• Tyrone E: Let her brother who was on drugs steal money and property from and protect him and say ‘o u know he got a problem” I was pissed and that is why she is an ex today
• K-LUST THE WILDEST MOUTH!: HAVE MY DAUGHTER AROUND ANOTHER MAN! IT MADE ME WANNA KNOCK BOTH OF EM OUT!
• !James!:  She went back to her ex, she say it was for the kids. She wanted me to stay in the background. I did and eventually she left him for her safety. It’s harder to trust, I keep 1 eye open at all times.
• ”DUKE” BANNER: I WAS DOING OFF SHORE OIL RIGGING AND WHEN I LEAVE THIS SCOUNDREL WOULD BRING A JOE TO THE HOUSE I WAS MORE ASHAME BECAUSE ALL HE DID WAS DRINK STAYED WITH HIS MOTHER TALKING ABOUT SHE GOT HI AND SHE KNEW HIM AND IT STARTED FROM THERE
• Tony Raymond **CANDIDA whores me**:  Cheat but i just come to learn ALL sexes knows what they WANT but never what they NEED…even if your mouth say you need this or that because they always go after what they want…
• Tori A:  cheated on me w/ someone I [thought] was a good friend
• DJ Urban Cowboy: My most recent ex took my phone and decided to rummage through my txts… Big no no in my book.
• Kip S:  Forget my birthday after being in a relationship with me for over a year.

 

       You know what they say… hurt people, hurt people. Yes, some of this is funny to read, but it still doesn’t make ANY of it right. At what point are people going to be honest with themselves about what they want, what they need, and what the other person is offering. I think if hoes would admit to being hoes they could find each other. There are sugar daddies out there for the gold diggers, but leave the good boys and girls alone. Stick to your own kind. It is just point less for all of this to go on. We are just creating more hurt people all the while wondering why you can’t find a good one. YEs, I am prepared to fuck the chick(s) up who dare hurts my future husband… I will hunt you down! lol. TRY ME!

Okay, this is getting depressing, but it was an interesting write-up. Hope you enjoyed…. on to the next one.

Sincerely,

~*My Mother’s Daughter*~

Lyrically Speaking: Keri Hilson~ Intuition

        A man’s arch nemesis has been and will ALWAYS be a woman’s intuition. I think it was apart of the deal when he snatched Adam’s rib. His rib contained 10% of Adam’s DNA which was a divine tracking device and lie detector. It lets the woman know when something isn’t right even when she can’t quite put a finger on it. I can’t describe it, but it is the oddest feeling in the entire world. She could just be sitting there when all of a sudden something tells her to call her man…..while on the other side of town he is getting his freak on with her best friend. Yes, it is like a face off between Batman and the Riddler. It is just this feeling…..

        And as I thought about this topic… one of my favorite songs came to mind. Keri Hilson’s “Intuition”. Yes, this song just screams “I am woman, hear me roar. I know you did wrong, negro don’t play me. Now pack your shit and bounce.” hahahaha I don’t know if that was her intention when she wrote it, but that became my subtext when I heard it. I think it is all even, right? I mean… I know for a fact that EVERY woman pleading Intuition isn’t on the right path, but for the other 99.999999% of us who listen to our intuition for the right reasons, we are hardly ever wrong. A wise woman once told me that our intuition is God snitching on the universe. What an image, right…. but it works. So I go with my gut feelings majority of the time and I am right.

        Now this song has a taste of both Indian and Asian instrumentation to it, and I think that would be a great place to start with my interpretation of the video.

        I think that the video should start with Keri asleep in bed. As her man grabs the keys off the dresser and you see the door closing behind him.

“Intuition”

Whoa [3x]

Hey hey…

Keri pops up in bed and begins to look around. She leans over and looks out the window as she sees him backing out of the driveway.

[Chorus]
I got this crazy feeling
I’m gone be single again
I know it, I can feel it
I know you gone mess up

        Keri gets out of bed and walks to throw on an Asian designer trench coat with a fidora, glances in the mirror by the front door, grabs her keys and hops in her car.

Wow, you really turn me on
So I, I really hope I’m wrong [whoa]
It would break my world If you ain’t true to me, yea
But I’m not the silly girl I used to be
And I Know how it goes yea

       She comes to a light and sees his car outside of a massage parlor. Shot switches to her walking through the parlor looking for her guy. She catches him getting a massage in one of the rooms and she rubs her hands down his back. He pops up to look around but Keri is gone and in her car back home

[Pre-Chorus]
Dude’s out here think they slick
Got a lot of girls on they (dadadadada)
And they can’t say no
Steady telling me they ain’t you
I’ma wait to see what you gone do
Hope you know you got a good thing, yea

[Chorus]
I got this crazy feeling
I’m gone be single again
I know it, I can feel it
I know you gone mess up

I got this crazy feeling
I’m gone be single again
I know it, Its gone happen
I know you gone mess up

       Fast forward technique to push the story ahead a few hours. Scene stops at Keri fighting with a guy while she is wearing a kimono. The fight is brief and he walks out of the house. With Keri walking along the window of the house. Shot cuts to Keri walking along the glass window of an Asian restaurant with her “guy” sitting at a dinner table obviously waiting for someone for dinner. She is on her Inspector Black Chick trying to get a better view of him. The entire restaurant is filled with guys sitting at tables by themselves with an all female staff.

I, I love the way we fight so
So, I hope this is all in my mind (hope it’s in my mind)
Baby don’t you know
It would break my world, if you ain’t true to me yea
But I’m not the silly girl I used to be
See I know how it goes

       The servers in the restaurant and random  staff members throughout the dining area join in for choreography. Some women are private detectives with cameras and notepads. The servers are performing choreography around the guy’s table that they are servicing, every guy but Keri’s. The servers collect glasses, and utensils CSI style and places them in an evidence bag, placed back on the serving tray and exit the dining area.

[Pre-Chorus]
Dude’s out here think they slick
Got a lot of girls on they (dadadadada)
But they don’t say no
Steady telling me they ain’t you
I’ma wait to see what u gone do
Hope you know you got a good thing cause I,

[Chorus]
I got this crazy feeling
I’m gone be single again
I know it, I can feel it
I know you gone mess up

I got this crazy feeling
I’m gone be single again
I know it, Its gone happen
I know you gone mess up

 

        Then you see everything go pitch black, when a spotlight pops up over one guy like an interrogation lamp. Keri walks up to the two-way window and her silhouette is seen dancing directly in front of her guy. Snippets of individual female detectives come into the light surrounding him.

Your gonna get too comfortable (you gone mess up)
Gonna want something new babe (you gone mess up)
Your gonna be just like the rest (you gone mess up)
It’s gonna be you babe before me

         They release him and he is free to leave. Keri is seen in a designer trench coat walking behind him out of the police station.  He gets to his car and pulls off before her. She runs to her car and speeds off.

I trust my heart, broke down my guard
I worked so hard to take good care of you

I trust my heart, broke down my guard
I worked so hard, I hope it ain’t true

       Keri begins to say this next part into her rear view mirror. She pulls up next to him, glances over, and then runs through a red light and he stops. She makes it home before him.

Look at me
You wanna miss all this?
Go ‘head
Bring that back
Whoa [3x]

        As he reaches for the front door, Keri opens it in her Kimono and takes his hand to lead him upstairs.

 

It’s in my mind
Whoa [3x]
Hope its in my mind

        There is a pan in shot of a photo in her bag of him sitting at the table in the restaurant by himself and then a figure of a woman fades into view in the chair across from him. She has on a fidora to cover her face and the video ends.

        Yeh…I know. Wild and all over the place. But this has that Carmen San Diego feel about it. A woman detective going on a hunch. That inner voice telling her that something isn’t right. And though she may not have the proof… it’s there. So, that was my take on it…. did you like it?

       Check back tomorrow when I ask my 200 Men about the 2 things they wish that women would stop doing. How does that tie into intuition? Well, we already know as women what we want guys to stop or start doing…so why not hear from them. Maybe these are the things that make them misbehave which in turn peaks our intuition.  [Will insert Link here]

        Scroll Down to leave a comment or read comments. If you are on the Homepage, click the title of this individual blog to see or leave a comment.

Sincerely,

*My Mother’s Daughter*~

Lyrically Speaking: Lyfe Jennings~Hero

        I searched high and low for a song that I thought would speak of a woman’s worth that was not sung by Maxwell or Alicia Keys. I also wanted to mix that with a song that sang of an appreciation for an independent woman who was not put to a rap beat or came within ten feet of Destiny’s Child or Ne-Yo. So one day, listening to my Rhapsody playlist I came across one of my favorite singers, Lyfe Jennings, and his song Hero. Eureka! This is what the juggling of one’s balls must feel like… because I got a great feeling in my happy place when I heard this song. I thought…. this is as subliminal of a message as you can get when it comes to being an independent woman.

        Tomorrow you will get to read my blog about what 200 Men Said…. An Independent Woman’s Place [<~Click Here to Read]….but today I wanted to celebrate her. I wanted to celebrate the independent woman free of a bitter bitch anthem and really vibe out to her without even saying the words “independent woman”…well, outside of this intro.  Because a REAL independent woman does, a wannabe shouts about it. You will NEVER hear a REAL independent woman claim the title, but everyone else will call her one. It is in the core of who she is and everyone around her can feel her independent power and never feel negated by that power. And I wanted to celebrate her with a Lyrically Speaking song that many may not have heard;I think that Lyfe did a wonderful job in capturing that.

        I see the opening of the video very reminiscent of a Superman meets Clark Kent moment. She should start in her Clark Kent stage with her hair down, cute little house dress via Victoria Secrets. Nothing kinky looking but short and regular but still seductive in nature. Think, her wearing his button-up or his college football jersey, etc.  The shot should be Lyfe sitting at the kitchen table finishing off dinner as he starts singing and then gets up to put his plate in the sink walking directly up behind his “Hero”. And he should grab her and maaaaaaybe give her a pelvic thrust on the last line.

Verse 1

Superman can’t cook chicken like this, (this)*
And Wonder Woman can’t french kiss, (kiss)
Aladdin only gave me one wish (wish),
That’s yo body

 

        She playfully pushes him away  and starts to back up because she knows where this is heading. Lyfe follows and presses her up against the wall just as he says the last line.

Spiderman don’t forgive me when I’m wrong, (wrong)
Batman don’t look good in that thong, (thong)
Catwoman don’t keep me rock this long (long)
That’s yo body

         Then I think that he should stay still as she leaves from under him. He then turns and leans on the wall where she once was as there is a speed reel like in Adam Sandler’s movie CLICK where he presses fast forward and everything but him speeds up. His “Hero” is shown getting the kids ready for extracurricular activities like football and karate practice, leaving to take them and returning. Leaving to get groceries, and returning with bags. She drops one in fast mode and “Regular Speed” Lyfe catches the bag and sets it on the counter. She’s even seen cleaning the house and putting the kids to bed before it comes back to regular speed as she is closing the door to the kids’ room; throughout this Lyfe is walking regular speed.

[Chorus:]
It’s a bird, (it’s a bird) it’s a plane, (it’s a plane) it’s an angel down here
With no wangs, it’s a bird, (it’s a bird) it’s a plane, (it’s a plane) short shorty
It’s the hero song everybody sing along.
You are my hero (hero), you don’t need a costume everybody knows your name,
The greatest hero (hero) you can make me feel good even when your miles away.
You are my hero (hero) you can make the sun shine even when the sky is gray,
The greatest hero (hero) one kiss from your lips and all my troubles fly away.

        She is seen walking seductively down the hallway headed towards Lyfe who is sitting at a keyboard. She places a bowl of soup on the table next to him right before she straddles across his lap and they are looking into his each other’s eyes before they kiss. Lyfe picks her up and walks over to the bed and gently lays her down as the shot pans beyond him to the window to watch the sky change from night to day.

Verse 2

Wolverine can’t cheer me up when I’m sad, (sad)
Captain America can’t slow dance, (dance)
Hulk can’t make a boy feel like a man (man)
That’s Yo body

Aguaman can’t work a job with two kids, (kids)
Iceman can’t cook soup when I’m sick, (sick)
Wonder Twins don’t know how to work this stick (stick, stick)
That’s yo body

[CHORUS]

It’s a bird, (it’s a bird) it’s a plane, (it’s a plane) it’s an angel down here
With no wangs, it’s a bird, (it’s a bird) it’s a plane, (it’s a plane) short shorty
It’s the hero song everybody sing along.
You are my hero (hero), you don’t need a costume everybody knows your name,
The greatest hero (hero) you can make me feel good even when your miles away.
You are my hero (hero) you can make the sun shine even when the sky is gray,
The greatest hero (hero) one kiss from your lips and all my troubles fly away.

        As the view pans back out Lyfe is laying in bed by himself asleep as she walks into view fully dressed for work but now she is in Superman mode; hair in a bun, power suit, and heels with brief case. She shakes him and walks out of the room. Now every shot her “Superman” outfit changes. She gets to the hallway to call for the kids and she looks like a Doctor, walks into the kitchen to hand them their lunches and she now looks like a police offer. Walking to the front door she looks like a waitress. By then Lyfe has made it there and given her a kiss and as the shot goes to her pulling back from the kiss in front of the open door.The next shot is her outside as she closes the front door to head to the car as a pregnant stay-at-home mom.

Up and away (up and away) off to work she leaves,
back at four thirttttttty, we’ll make love till we fall asleep,
when we wake up, she’ll put on that cape again,
me and my hero, me and angel, me and my girl and my best friend.

Lyfe goes into the kitchen and pours himself a bowl of cereal and walks into the family room and sits on the couch during this next few bars.

You are my hero (hero) you don’t need a costume everybody knows your name,
the greatest hero (hero) you can make me feel good even when your miles away,
you are my hero (hero) you can make the sun shine even when the sky is gray.
the greatest hero (hero) one kiss from your lips and all my troubles fly away. (yeah)

        Just as he sits, his “Hero” is seen walking into the house with the 3 kids running past her, no longer pregnant. She stops in the doorway and she undoes the bun in her hair as Lyfe calls her into the family room where Captain America & Friends is on TV. She is now back in the same mode that she was in at the start of the video; loose hair, glasses, and comfortable cute house dress with footy socks. She sits down & cuddles next to him and he hands her the bowl of cereal and wraps his arms around her as the song goes off.

Shorty this the hero song, everybody sing along
Shorty this the hero song, everybody sing …
Shorty this the hero song everybody sing along,
Shorty this the hero song, thank you for singing along

 

         Yeh…. if I had a say so in the video…. that is EXACTLY how I would direct it. I think it tells a tale of how the every day woman can, in fact, be a hero. These are the unsung independent women that don’t seek praise nor boast about their independent power, but they are independent women just the same. I don’t know Lyfe’s intentions when he wrote the song, but I am in LOVE with it. It is my own personal anthem because this is the kind of woman who I am and would like to continue to be. So, I salute Lyfe for this song and I salute the true independent women who don’t apologize for being the women that they are because they don’t have to. And that is said without attitude or pride. Dont get that confused with the need to shout your independence from the mountain tops running all the good men away. Or feeling that you need to shout it to get a strong man to want to be with you. Trust me, wannabes…..if you shut the fuck up… he will come. lmao! And that is all I have to say about that.

These are gonna be the longest 3 years. But we’ll be here waiting for your return Lyfe. God bless!

P.S. Scroll down the page to post a comment or to read comments

P.P.S. If you are on the homepage, Click on the title Lyrically Speaking to go to the actual page.

Sincerely,

~*My Mother’s Daughter*~

 

200 Men Asked….Special Edition

        So, I figured that since I ask my 200 men sooooo many questions, I might as well allow them to ask me question or two. So, there is no other rhyme or reason to this blog other than to post the questions that they asked me and for me to answer.  I also find it interesting to see what questions they chose to ask me when given the opportunity to do so….lol. Well, here we go.

So I asked my regular 200 Men:

I am ALWAYS asking you a question. Thanks for answering. But if there was one thing that you could ask me and I HAVE to answer it, what MATURE & RESPECTABLE question would you ask?

And they, in return, asked me:

MR. LOVING: Why are you here? What do you do? If you are single, why are you?

        WOWZERS! I did say ONE question right? So, since the question is a legally binding statement I get to answer one of these questions. So, I choose the first. I am on [this social network] to meet cool and interesting people; mission accomplished. I love to come here and chat with different people. And 200 Men Said and the Questions application is amazing.

Lateef25: Why are you so curious of what men think?

        I think that I am so curious as to what men think is because seldom do we ever hear what you all think. As a woman, magazines are written for women, by women. And if you do get a book about what a man wants or thinks that is written by a man, that is only THAT man’s perspective which cuts out the other 99.99999999 percent of men out there who think differently. So, I though….why not ask 200 Men questions to get a wide range of experiences and opinions. Plus, I have a ton of female followers on Twitter (@_2Deep_) that ask me questions. I give them advice but I think that it means more to have them view what you write as an answer to my question. That way they dont think I’m just another girl giving girl advice, but real men telling them how it is on the other side of the fence. Besides, most of the time I think like guys in certain situations so I am highly guy sensitive..lol. And finally, the world is all about uplifting women… seldom do you see anything male focused… so I thought that I would do my part.

Nigi “Pistol Star” Pu Yi: Simply 2 Share Ur Knowledge wit Me 2 Help Me Grow In Our God’s Eyes, Mind, Spirit, n Vessel..Thx

        I don’t think that was a question…. but thanks just the same. Read my answer to Lateef25 & let me know if you like it.

Chub L:  Mature and respectable huh? lol….Anywho!, #1. What gruesome events have transpired in your life that have caused you to be as no non-sense as you are? #2. Why do you like asking me questions?

        Ummm…. Check out My blog Advice From the Other Woman , The House My Father Built, and What Happens in this House: A Molestation Survivor Speaks (Click the Blue to read those blogs). There is SOOOOO much more, but that is where it starts. I have come, and continue to come, to the conclusion that those are just things that I have overcome and not situations that define me. So, I made up in my mind that people were not going to run over me or bullshit me and anyone who does will get canceled quick. Hope that answers your question.

rroyallty: How about this: What are some of the most annoying/ignorant questions that you have received from guys on [social networkin site]? Do you 1. respond put them, 2. put them on blast on your wall or 3. just ignore them.

        Okay, I see what is happening, everyone thought that they get to ask 2 questions because I said “mature and respectable”. lmao! NOPE!  But to answer your question, I think it depends. Sometimes I just dont have the energy to put a guy in his place so they get ignored. Other times I just have to put them in their place, but I do so by using reverse psychology. lol. Like if a guy says something sexual to me that is inappropriate I may tell him that he is so much better than what he is displaying of himself and that he shouldnt even want a female who would reply to that. Other times I just go straight for the nuts and gut check ’em. lol. And yes, sometimes I have placed people on my status just to let the rest of the nut bags know not to mess with me. So, yeh, it depends.

 CHRIST- O:  Could you, as Queen, express the lady inside you, while taking charge like a real Independent Woman and still be the supporting structure in a serious relationship?

        Okay, so I wrote 3 Blogs about this: Lyrically Speaking: Lyfe Jennings~ Hero, 200 Men Said…. An Independent Woman’s Place, and 200 Men Said….Cater to Me (All of which will be posted in the upcoming weeks so come back and check out those links..lol) But to answer your question and not give away the blogs….yes, yes I can. I think that the term independent woman captures all that in its true definition. If I had to pick two eras where I could live comfortably it would be the 90s during the day and the 50s at night. I so much want to be a power house kind of woman during the day and a cater to my man type of woman at night. I dont think that one would take away from the other at all. I don’t have to be under my man all of the time, but when I am I cherish those moments and appreciate them greatly. I believe that in order for me to be there for my man I need to have my life, and my own goals in order to come back to support him by using my experiences and my problem solving skills. The experiences that will build together will be a bonus for me, a bonus that I look forward to. So, now that you have caused me to lose my street credit…. may I move on to the next question? lol.

 Black Kryptonite aka the KID: Why do you ask so many questions? After awhile that can kind of become . . . . I think you get the point

        LMAO! Well, first…. I thank you for your honesty. Secondly, I ask so many questions because I was just starting the series here on my blog. I didn’t know how long I would have the attention of you all so I thought that I would ask as many questions as I could think of and how ever many questions my Twitter followers could send me. But now that I am actually behind in writing blogs I have slowed down a bit…lol. But I thank you for answering them. I promise not to be a pain in the ass any more.

Code Name Bigsexy: lol. I’m a man so I’ll go with…. are you attracted to me?

        LMAO! Sexy… I swear you are a trip and you keep me smiling. I mean… yeh, you could get it. lmao! I would have to let me resident White Boy Drew Law know that you are giving him a run for his money, because I am all ready for a fight over me. hahahah. But I like your straight-forwardness, and how you are you and that you never change. Your character is amazing and is very admirable. So keep doing you boo… it’s sexy.  Just don’t take any more prison squat pics…lmao! You know I had to get ya!

!: If you met a guy you really liked but he was only interested in companionship or very close friend with benefits but nothing serious at the moment…would you be okay with that ?

        Ummm… would I be seeking a relationship with him? I mean, no matter what I have to listen to what he is saying and NOT what I am interpreting him to say. And yes, I have become good friends with guys that I really liked and over time they remained good friends and I am happy with that. Every guy you like is not meant to be a person that you will date and you have to be mature enough to understand that. Also, as time goes by you find out more about them and become thankful that you didn’t date them…lol. Now the whole frienifits package… ummm… I have only done that once and yeh, never again. I say never again because it becomes pointless to share yourself but not share yourself. It’s like you are a kissing a person you are not in a relationship with and that seems so friggin pointless. Had fun, but never again. He messed it up for everyone. lol. Just kidding, he didn’t mess it up, it just wasnt the arrangement for me to have with him. Lord I am telling too much… NEXT!

 ICE: Would you put more pics up of you in a shirt and heels?

        Hey rroallty, was this the type of questions you were referring to? lmao! Just kidding, but not! Ummm… ICE, to answer your question… probably not. That was a one time photo shoot and I was the one with the MOST clothes on in the entire house…lol. But I take it that you enjoyed the photos and I thank you for that.

DSMILEY1: Why are you not married yet? 

        Usually…..I ignore this question. But I will give you an answer because you asked. I am not married because I have yet to be asked by a man for me to marry him. My typical answer, when pressed for one, is because it was not my time to be married or again, my husband hasn’t met me yet. I always find that a weird question to ask a woman, because it is obvious. She hasnt be asked. Now it seems more appropriate to ask a guy since he is the one who does all of the asking. But when the day comes, if the man is the one….. I will say yes. Was that too smart-ass of an answer? I tried so hard not to be…lol.

 

P Reddz: Are you a shrink or a detective? No disrespect. Your questions are all good questions. 

       

       WHy does everyone say that?!!!!! No, I am neither. But it seems like I should be because you are not the first to ask me that. I just think I was supposed to be an investigative journalist of sorts.

 

BIG SEKZI: What’s your ethnic background

       

        I am a mut! lmao!!! Of course I am African American. My grandmothers are both African-American, my great grandmother on my mother’s side was half Native American and half African. My Great-Great grandmother on my mother’s side was FULL blooded Native American (her picture is beautiful!) & my Great-Great Grandfather was a slave. My mom has that Naija blood in her veins. NIGERIA STAND UP!!!My Dad’s side of the family is sprinkled with Puerto Ricans & Good Ol’ Black Folks…lmao. [Shot out to my cousins, the Garcias] And I was born in Germany….lol. So yeh.. I’m eclectic, to say the least.

PIECE OF WORK!! $$PET$ PET$ PET$$$: What makes you keep conversing with me?

        For starters, because you are intelligent enough to use the word conversing. THAT IS SEXY AS HELL!!!! Yeh… you can get it. lol. But because I think you are a mystery and I like that. SO keep being you.  Plus, you’re not so bad on the eyes. lol.

 

”DUKE” BANNER:  As a woman of your caliber, would you date a man below your standards because of what he looks like?

       

        Ummmmm. Can I plead the 5th? lmao! Okay, honestly? Yes, I have dated a guy who was dumber than dirt because he was fine as hell. But one day he said he wanted to take me to the National Mall to see the “pencil building.” And if you have the look on your face that I THINK you have… then you would know how I felt when he called the Washington Monument the “pencil building”. I never called him back after that. So, will I ever do it again? Ummm NEGATIVE! I have learned that the very standards that I would like for guys to hold me to and appreciate me for are the very things that I need to appreciate guys for as well. Lesson learned.

 

 

 …….:  How high is the sky? And give me the square mileage of earth?

 

        Since you are my resident smart ass… I had to reciprocate and be a smart ass with ya…lol. FYI….the second part is NOT a question but I shall oblige just the same. So since the term “sky” is so vague I had to get specific as to fully answer your question. So, how high is the sky?:

Troposphere	ground to 6 miles
Stratosphere	6 miles-50 miles
Ionosphere	50-300 miles
Exosphere	300-600 miles

And give you the square mileage of the Earth? No problem, sir. The Earth’s surface is composed of 196,939,900 square miles. I hope that this answers your question. lol.

 

Aries Brotha: What’s the best way to gain your attention, or get on your good side?

 

       What kind of question is that? That’s like you asking me what is the easiest way to break into my house and where are all of my valuables…lmao! I get what you mean, but I can’t tell you that. What I will tell you is to be you at all times. If who you are works well with my patience level, then you are golden. If it doesn’t, then it was nice knowing you while it lasted. You should also learn not to tell people how to please you because wannabes and fakes will immediately become that to please you. But if people have nothing to go off of but themselves, they will eventually slip up and show you their true colors.

 

 

 !! MYLES C AKA Mr.Grown-N-Sexxxi !!:  Hmmmm, would you be willing to give me a chance?

 

        Gee, Golly, WOW! Straight to the point.  Well… my honest answer will be…… Yeh. But by yeh  I mean, I am giving you a chance to converse with me. I never promise anything beyond conversation. I don’t know much about you other than what you answer in my blog. So sure… you can converse with me. Who knows what friendship could come from this. But from what I have seen thus far…. you’re pretty amazing. And ….not bad on the eyes either. lol.

 

        Like I said… it was going to be interesting to see what they asked me after the SEA of questions that I have hit them with over the past month and a half. I think these were good questions, but naturally….women are accustomed to asking more and better questions…lmao! I might do this again in the future. Thanks guys!

 

Sincerely,

~*My Mother’s Daughter*~

200 Men Said….Words vs Actions

If I read one more “Don’t Play Games With Your Man, But Fake an Orgasm to Keep Him” self-help book I think that I will crawl in a cave with Osama and start learning his techniques to torture relationship gurus! (ONLY RELATIONSHIP GURUS, people….its just a joke. And to the IT people on my job reading this… JOKE! Like, HAHAHA, funny.)

        Believe it or not, a ton of these books, mainly the ones written by men, are the most confusing books in the world! Dont play games, but keep him chasing you. You do know that suggests that I shouldnt be open about the way I feel because he may not be ready for that , therefore play like I am so hard to catch when I am really sitting by the phone watching Real Housewives ignoring his call. One will say keep the cookies in a cookie jar while another will tell you that a man loves intimacy and will not marry you unless he knows what ingredients your cookies are created from. Hmmm.. cant wait to see that on the Food Network. lmao! And my all time favorite source of advice is that you should watch what a man does and not what he says. What kind of schitzo fuckery is that all about? So my man says he’ll be home for dinner at 5pm so I don’t have dinner ready because I need to see what time he actually shows up? My man says he doesn’t love me but he sleeps with me every night so I should stay around based on what he is doing? LMAO!!! I know I joke a lot but My name is NOT Boobisha The Fool. None of that makes sense at all to me. I am trying to wrap my head around it, but it’s just not stretching.

       I think that a man’s words should match with his actions. And since no one is perfect, when they don’t match a woman should seek clarification and the lines of communication should be there to ensure that they are on the same note. If they never realign…then it is time to bounce. And yes, I know that nothing in life is ever that simple, but the principle remains the same, either you are or you are not…and there is no in between. This is why the status “Its Complicated” on social networks bother me… negro either you are single or you are not. Sneaking in the bathroom to call your jump off but whispering you love her is a pure contradiction because you should be man enough to say it out loud. YEH, I SAID IT… MAN ENOUGH!!! *wipes nose with back of hand thug style* AND WHAT?!

       So, while writing my blog 200 Men Said…. Let a Man be a Man [<~Come Back later for link] I came across a comment by Chub L where he said:

” Many swear that what one does or demonstrates declares what they feel. That is true BS – we as human beings still need to hear and feel what mere tangible things can never satisfy.”

       And it hit me….. time to ask my 200 men their opinion. I wanted to know that if their actions were the opposite of what they felt and their words conflicted…. which version of the situation should I pay attention to. So, I asked:

If your words and actions were to contradict each other after an argument, which would you want your girlfriend to pay the MOST attention to? Your Words or your Actions? Why?

       Yes, I can admit that this is a loaded, and seemingly unfair question to ask… but life isn’t fair.. lmao. I actually want to see who will fight against the grain and say “both”. I also want to see the reasons they give, if any for picking one over the other. So, after about an hour of asking this question…. the answers started to roll in. And the men said….

• Nigi “Pistol Star” Pu Yi: Pay More attention to my actions first then my words. People may just do things without an understanding of saying to them or having it be felt rather than heard!
•  Mr. Mayor**DARKSTARZ INC PREZ**: I just think you should put more effort in making the two meet… If you say for example that you love some… your actions should show that and if they don’t you should work at it, not just expect someone to accept that they don’t…
• DSMILEY1 :  My words; because communication is the key 
• Lateef25:  A combination
• Vince V: If this was something that happened between my girl and I, I would want her to point this out so we could straighten out the situation. Because I like to back up my words with my actions so she can trust everything i tell her and i can stay true to being a man of my word.
• James F: I want her to pay attention to both;words and actions. Both mean something
•  …….: Neither,why would you take someone confused seriously?
• rroyallty: They won’t contradict. When I say what I have to say my actions will follow. There is no in between. She needs to follow both cuz they will be in unison
• Code Name Bigsexy: Both, because if I do something other than what I say there should be a problem.You got to talk the talk and walk the walk
• MR. LOVING: Now if they were to contradict then it would be up to her.
• James M: If they contradicted..pay the most to actions because actions don’t lie.
•  CHRIST-O: MY ACTIONS, A MOUTH CAN SAY ANYTHING
• Aries Brotha: My actions. I’m one of those guys that when I’ve lost my cool. I can’t convey what I wanna say. So it’s best to read my body language, and adjust yourself accordingly. More times than not I’ll just shut down and just sit there while they talk.

 

And my FAVORITE response came from my residential comedian:

 

• Chub L: my words. I’m a firm believer that actions speak louder than words, but please be gutsy and work with both – women are famous for multi-tasking. Multi-task that.

 

        So, after a few examples, it is nice to see that my previous prediction held true. Majority of the men said both because their words and their actions should be in alignment. So i was validated in some way. A man’s words and his actions should be in accord with one another majority of the time. But as we all know, no one is perfect. A man will act out should his pride or emotions come in jeopardy and those actions may be in total conflict with what it is that he actually means. This is a defense mechanism. You’ve seen it. The guy standing on the block with his boys, sees a fine woman and she turns him down and he immediately yells, “I didn’t want your ugly ass any way.” We all know that he did and that the girl wasnt ugly…. but those actions didn’t match with how he really felt. So, what do you do with his words and his actions are in contradiction with one another?

 

       Some say listen to my words, while others say watch my actions, but who do we believe? People can do anything and say just about anything. I think it then becomes time for the woman to live in reality and not fantasy. What has his track record shown you? Has he kept his promises ( which, oddly enough, takes action after speaking words)? Has his actions been that of respect and integrity? And do you want a person who says things but doesn’t follow through? Or do you want a guy who never says the right things but puts things into action? Like “…….” said, why do you want to deal with such confusion? That coming from a man. It is up to you as to which to believe, or listen to more, and you have to live with the choices you make. But Like Aries Brother said, sometimes he cant say what it is that he feels but he may be open to showing you. So ladies you must be open to looking for visual communication as well. Every man will not be the best communicator and you have to adapt to that as well.  Every man is very different so what worked with the last man may not work with this man. But my 200 men have proven that a real man will seldom contradict himself. If he says he loves you, then he will show it. If he shows that he loves you…..be patient, he will eventually say it.

 

I thank my 200 Men for being honest.

 

Sincerely,

~*My Mother’s Daughter*~

Lyrically Speaking….Urban Mystic: I Refuse

        I’ll never forget where I was when I first heard this song. I was on the phone with my high school sweetheart after about a year of me not speaking to him. He was back at his old tricks of trying to get me to fall for him all over again. He told me to check out this song, and I had never even heard of the artist, much less the song….but I said that I would. And I did. Loved it. Thought that I should burst out into singing “Killing Me Softly” because Urban Mystic was telling my whole life with his words.

        This song has that high school feel. That, “talking on the phone all night or at least holding the phone as you fall asleep” type feel. This song just oozes the rekindling of an old flame. This is NOT the song you need to play while you are engaged to your future wife ( just saying) lmao!. But it does have that “tug on the heartstrings of hopeless romantics who cant wait to be with their first loves just once more” type feel.

The intro is enough to make you call everyone in your black book and make individual appointments. lol

Intro:urban(woman)
yo baby (what?s up)
what we had was so special (yea I know)
what you doin now (left my man back at the 9 to 5 just trying to make things work)
Yeah, I never thought I?d see you again (and I never thought I?d see you again)
yeah, (what a coincidence)
well that?s how things happen (yea I know, I wanna have you just one more time)
But you know what (what’s that)
You know what?s odd (what is it)

        Her tone is just begging for him to come and get it. It’s almost as if she planned for them to meet again. Like she searched for him and put herself in a place to be strategically found by him. I’m not mad at her. I would do the same damn thing…lol I mean, how simple is the intro? But this is about as kinky as Teddy Pendergrass talking over a track. It says “Get those panties off… TAKE ‘EM OFF!” lmao.

Verse 1:
What are the odds of me bumping into you again (one in a million)
What are the odds of me seeing my first lover friend (two in a million)
It’s been two years since we both graduated, I still can feel how we both celebrated
I can’t get over your voice on my phone, we’ve been apart for so long.

 

        This takes me back to that time when you locked eyes with the person that you love after being apart for so long. Or even the thought of them that sends chills down your spine and ends at your happy place. I mean really… they had to have been something special that without even touching you or being in the same room with you they can make you smile and head towards a cold shower.  What are the odds of every person doing that to you? Zero in a million.

Chorus:
So I refuse to wait, my patience is out the door baby
I refuse to hear you say, u don’t want me no more baby
I refuse to blame, you for anything – me for any thing
lets not take finding each other in vain, its not a coincidence baby

 

        Obviously, all is forgiven or they are just that horny. lol. I mean he is not even wanting to hold a grudge. I mean she has GOT to have kryptonite in her panties to get a man to go out on a limb like this. I’m still having a hard time trying to figure out if this is love or lust, but in the moment of passion I don’t think that it really matters, now does it? lol

Verse 2:
Remember we use to sneak off when your mama dosed off
Hit the back seat of my Chevy fog up the windows
Made love to sweet lady our favorite song
kept it moving slow and steady to the tempo
Then we would lay there and hold on to each other like there wasn’t a tomorrow
I can’t get over your voice on the phone, we’ve been apart for so long

 

        LMAO!!! See parents….THIS is why you should equip your child with house arrest ankle bracelets! lol.  Teach your girls that leather burn is a hoe’s tattoo…lol. This verse in and of itself just keeps me cracking up! It is so romantic, and so serious, yet hilariously funny because someone , somewhere has done some…if not all..of this at one point in time in their life. And there he is remembering it all years later. See…if you got that Good Good ladies they will always remember. Better yet, he will admit to cuddling!!!!!!! Chorus repeats and then…..

Verse 3

You know, damn well, you’re suppose to be in my life
Riding by my side (Oh yeah yeah)
You know, damn well, you’re suppose to be coming home to me every night

Baby if you’re not that far away
Maybe we can spend the day
Catch up on all the loving we lost
Let me kiss you in your favorite place

        So….. if he doesn’t get what he wants he damn near gets beligerent..lol. YOU KNOW DAMN WELL, WOMAN! All he wants to do is kiss you in your favorite place.  Just KINKY!!! KINKY , I TELL YA! lol.  Yep.. been there. Had the kind of passion where you knew better than to be left alone in the same place with that other person because baby making would surely follow no matter the consequences…. *shakes head at the thought* Sorry, had a flash back…lmao!

        Well, every time I listen to this song I think of what I went through that made this song so relevant to me. I thank the person who decided to bring it to my attention and I will always hold a special place for this song in my heart. Tales like this really do happen in real life….and I am a witness to it. Unfortunately, it doesn’t always turn out to be a love connection….but the memories are a nice reminder of what love can look like. It gives you hope of what is in the future. And if nothing else, it is just nice to know that you are wanted. I refuse to lose hope for love. I simply refuse to.

P.S. I also refuse not to die laughing at the fact that the model who Tyra Banks yelled at is in this video. lmao.

P.P.S. I refuse to fight the urge to call him K-C from Jodeci. lmao!

Sincerely,

~*My Mother’s Daughter*~

 

200 Men Said…..Oedipus’s Words

A funny thing happened on the way to the forum. So, I thought of this question in early January and it has been sitting idly by in my blog cue for weeks. And then today I was sitting in my office listening to Pandora when India Arie‘s Talk to Her graced my headphones. [ To Read my blog about the lyrics, Click Here~> Lyrically Speaking:India Arie~Talk to Her]

        It has always baffled me how guys can walk up to you on the street or on the internet and have some of the most FOUL and inappropriate things come out of their mouths. It honestly made me wonder were they raised by wolves or if their mothers had any home training. Who does that?! There was a HUGE disconnect when it came to how you spoke to and respected your mother and how you are supposed to speak to a female that you are interested in. It was a prime example of The Village failing us again [To Read on my ideas about It Takes a Village<~Click Here]. Somewhere along the line this foulness had become acceptable, the norm, for guys to say whatever they wanted to either impress their boys or simply because they hadn’t been made to do better by the older males surrounding them, or by the women that they were seeking.

        As a woman with brothers galore and godbrothers to the hills, I know for a fact that my brothers would fight ‘AIN nut who thought that he would talk out the side of their neck in my direction. These are the same brothers that respect their women at all times. Of course they are guys and guys will do what guys do…. but they are not boys… my brothers are men. And yes, I know it sounds like Big sis is protecting her baby brothers, but it is more than that… I am using them as an example because I know that it can be done. Majority of my brothers are married, and the single ones ( meaning not married) have chosen some of the most wonderful women to share their time with that I would be proud to call any of them my sister-in-laws. It is possible.

        How can a man respect his mother who gave life and then disrespect a woman with whom he has chosen to share life? I don’t get it. I wonder how a guy would respond if a potential suitor walked up to his mother and said “Damn, you’s one fine bitch” or shouted out to his sister “I’d like to fuck you cuz you be a fine mufucker.” Yes, these are the things that have been said to my brothers’ sister, my nephew’s aunt, and my father’s daughter. Is it only because you only want to protect your own family, and make sure that women who share the same blood as you are respected but could care less about everyone else? I mean really, would you have respect for a female who answered to “Aye, yo… you come here”? What could a woman with that low of stock in her self-esteem do for you when you need a pick me up? What could she teach your current kids or future kids about demanding respect from others? Believe it or not, I think that the way a guy solicites a woman and the woman he decides to share his time with is a HUGE representation of who he feels he is and what he thinks he deserves. I mean really… do you think that Diddy would date Tasha’nae from Burger Kind while touring with Dirty Money? I think NOT! All he gets are J-Los because that is what he feels he deserves. Ever seen a physically beautiful girl with a physically not so attractive male? They both had a mutual understanding of what they both felt they deserved and it had, in some cases, nothing to do with materialistic things.

        So, I wanted to know how many of my 200 Men had forgotten their mothers at home when out and about conversing with women that they found interest in and I asked them the following question:

When choosing words to converse with a woman, have you ever said anything that you wouldn’t want said to you mother or your sister? If so, why did you say it to this woman? Send me a note for longer answers or clarification.

  

And their final answers were:

• James F:  the way i talk to other women and my mom is totally different…i mean im sure my mom has already heard some wild crazy things in her life so nah i dont even look at it like that…i say whatever i wanna say to women…she’s a woman she knows some of these b*tches and h*es aint sh*t….she tells me to beware of these lying ass scandalous b*tches she knows how some females can be
• *~ MR SPONTANEOUS ~*!!PEACE!!: I have never talked to any woman in a derogatory way……Its not my style. I was raised by Single Mom, GrandMa, Aunties, Cousins and Sisters.
•  Sincere:  never, because i have a mother, sister, and daughter
•  ”DUKE” BANNER: i must say, i have never disrespected my queen. i had a mother, i have a sister, niece ,even female cousins, you are my queen. never, no less, just like a queen. my conversation tells her how good she looks, how beautiful she is, what she means to me
• Tony Raymond **Thank El Grego**: Yes, i have and just because she is a woman doesn’t mean i am speaking to my mother. I am speaking to that person not to the whole sex class nor would i use different words for specific groups. I know you females are made from a different cloth than everything on the earth but that doesn’t eliminate you from being told of ones feels or espressions. We all are created equal as we all deserve the same thing, spoke to the same way when warranted (doesn’t mean disrespectful) and treated like the person whom you are to me. I am speaking from a biblical point of view because i don’t do the Human point of view since its proven we can’t govern ourselves correctly.
• K-LUST THE WILDEST MOUTH!: I AM A MASTER WITH WORDS, I JUST KNOW WHEN TO SAY AND LET MY ACTION SPEAK EVEN LOUDER THAN WORDS!
• Esau M: i watch what i say because what u say can effect the outcome of a lot of things
• James M: Yes, I have said things to a woman that I wouldn’t want said to my mother. They weren’t negative things but things said during sex or in intimate situations.
• Lateef25: yeah, mostly about sex in the heat of the moment
• Boss: NO, never
• Hit me up on facebook-Uriel B:   one time when I was talking with my home girl, I slipped and called my her a female dog but I apologized and told her that I didn’t mean to call her that
• Nigi “Pistol Star” Pu Yi:   nah, i never did..but there r no words that shouldnt b said to certain ppl..now there r words that shouldnt b said by certain ppl..like im sure my Mom could b a bitch..but would i call her one..no!
• RANDELL the caribbean prince[R]:  no, because i watch wat i say
• djmel1:  yes, i have. no comment. the game is to be sold not to be told.
• Code Name Bigsexy: well first off, you dont want to sleep with your mother. but if it works for the woman you talkin to then??
• Delonte M: I simply talk to my female peers and my mother different because one is my female peer and one is my mother. However, It’s not in me to disrespect female peers that I respect. I’m not rude to women unless they deserve it.
• rroyallty:  im sure I have said some harsh things and hurt some feelings in the past. No one is perfect. But as I have matured, I have learned from my mistakes and improve on the present and future
• Dezi: Yes, I have.
• BIG SEKZI: nope
• Sybree B:  no, i dont disrespect the women in my family and i would advise the next man not to either.
•  …….:  lol nothing wrong with a little talking dirty after dark.Nobody wants to ever envision there mother or sister hearing that kind of content.

 

        Okay… so let me make myself clear, based on reading these comments. It is okay to talk differently to your woman in the privacy of your bedroom when it comes to talking dirty. Of course, we are not into the whole Oedipus complex…we must separate that part from our parents. But any other time when speaking to a person of the opposite sex do you show them the same respect that you would want shown to the women in your family?

 

        I keep seeing a lot of my 200 men post that a woman needs to let a man be a man, and then when asked what that means, the man things that come up are for him to be a provider and a protector. If you are a man, you will provide and protect for every female that you come in contact with until she shows you that she is unworthy and then you stop and move on. Women are told all of the time to not brig baggage….men too have to learn to leave their baggage with the last woman who misused their chivalry and renew it with every new face that crosses their path. It is a cycle, you disrespect a sister of a guy who may one day date your sister and disrespect her and then children are born who watch disrespect being passed before them. Seems far-fetched but it isn’t. It is already happening.

 

        Using James F’s comment from above, his mother knows that these bitches aint shit so he can talk to us ay kind of way, right ( speculating)? This is the frame of mind that is running rampid in our communities and the good women are getting hit with these bullets like a drive-by shooter with bad aim. This is erroneous behavior; no disrespect to his mother or her methods of raising her son. No, there are SOME women who are bitches that aint shit, just like SOME men are dogs. I was taught, put on your best behavior until other behavior is warranted. Meaning, instead of introducing yourself as an ass….treat this person with the utmost respect until they disrespect you. Then, and only then, should you have the CHOICE to be disrespectful back, but even then you have the opportunity to remain respectful and walk away leaving them in their ignorance.  I am a strong believer that a MAN remains a man at all times, just as a WOMAN will remain a woman at all times. No one, and I mean no one but you should have the power to make you come out of the pocket of your character.

 

        If this is your behavior… there is time and room to mature. The more respect that you put into the universe is the same amount that you will get back in return. This life we were given is a journey of learning. It is a HUGE goal of mine to get every guy to understand the meaning behind what he broadcasts about himself into the world. There are enough social programs and bitter women to take care of the girls… I think I am the Man Whisperer. I get why some of the behavior occurs, but want to help them to present the best THEM that there is to present. One guy wanting to be a man at a time.

 

Sincerely,

~*My Mother’s Daughter*~

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Lyrically Speaking: India Arie~Talk to Her

        Sitting peacefully in my office, supposedly being productive when Pandora hits me with the gift of Neo-Soul‘s Past; India Arie‘s Talk to Her. I could have jumped up and belted this entire song out loud in my office without caring what anyone thought of me. Yes, this song spoke to my soul and I was prepared to be escorted out of the building by Federal Police. This was truly worth it. I immediately searched for the mp3 on the internet and placed it on repeat. I have a feeling that this CD will be played when I get home and immediately placed on my mp3 player.

        Why the excitement? Well… its India Arie! I can remember how I was first introduced to her and I became hooked and have bought every CD since. Not the iTunes….no, the CD!! I just have faith that every time I buy an India Arie project I will be able to listen to it from start to finish without complaint and that faith is bigger than a mustard seed. And I have to tell you, I have NEVER been disappointed. EVERY project is my favorite. SO much so, I had to stay away from her when she came to Busboys and Poets in DC because I didn’t want to hug her and get arrested like a crazed groupie. I was more than that… I was a supporter. Yes, ever since the day my little hippie friend Erin and her dark brown hair and glasses told me to listen to Brown Skin, I was hooked. Of course I wanted to know what a little white girl knew about Brown Skin, but she told me that her friend in Atlanta heard her and she wondered if I knew. Well… I didn’t and I felt excited that she had told me.

        The very first time that I heard this song I pictured that India Arie was a teacher in a class and the students were all teen black males & females. This song would be the lesson of the day. Essence and Vibe magazines would be the text books on every desk. Lyrics to the song would be written on the board, college lecture style. It would be a modern-day Lean on Me. Yes, I can picture it….or something like it. What if…..

        The video would start off with India Arie walking down a row of desks placing the last of the “text books” on the individual desk  in preparation for the arrival of the students back from lunch and/or recess. While singing she places the last book and then walks to write the topic “Talk to Her” on the chalkboard. A disagreement between a boy and his girlfriend comes into the shot and India walks over to the window.

Chorus:

When you talk to her talk to her
Like you want somebody to talk to you mama
Don’t get smart with her have a heart to heart with her
Just like you would with your daughter
Cause everything you do or say
You gotta live with it everyday
She’s somebody’s baby
She’s somebody’s sista
She’s somebody’s mama

        When she gets to the window and raises the window up even higher and sticks her head outside. The girlfriend storms away crying and India grabs the arm of the boy and sings the first verse to him.

Verse 1
Now when you got to her speak truthfully
Be honest as you can be, from your heart
You’re in a situation, where ya losing patience
Take your time and look her in the eye
When you just can’t find the words you want
And it’s hard to reach the point
Where you both can understand
Don’t just tell the truth
But,Tell the whole truth
It’ll make a better man outta you

        She gently touches his face and closes the window. Then in the background you see girls jumping rope and they become the background singers for this part. The guy apologizes and they make up.  The Bell rings and everyone heads into the school towards the end of the chorus.

Chorus:

When you talk to her, talk to her
Like you want somebody to talk to your mama
Don’t get smart with her have a heart to heart
With her just like you would with your daughter
Cause everything you do or say
You gotta live with it everyday
She’s somebody’s baby
She’s somebody’s sista
She’s somebody’s mama

        Scene switches to India Arie walking down the school halls. Girls wearing short skirts can be seen with guys whistling and attempting to pull up their dresses. India jumps in to correct the situation….. Words are spoken to both the boys and the girls to prove her point.

Verse 2:

It doesn’t matter if she’s wearin
A mini skirt or a business suit
Whether she’s 25 or 99
Treat her the way your mama taught you to
She could be the Queen of Sheba
She could be a school teacher
Home maker or a lawyer
I think it’s good for your Karma
If when ya talk to her…

        Female teachers open class doors to join in ask the chorus is being sung. They usher the students into the classrooms leaving India in the halls by herself.

Chorus:

When you talk to her, talk to her
Like you want somebody to talk to your mama
Don’t get smart with her have a heart to heart
With her just like you would with your daughter
Cause everything you do or say
You gotta live with it everyday
She’s somebody’s baby
She’s somebody’s sista
She’s somebody’s mama

        India can be seen walking past a boys’ and girl’s restroom and them comes to a stop underneath a clock with hands that are speeding up the time of day and to suggest that times are changing.  She continues to walk towards the auditorium.

Verse 3
Now let’s keep it real
Nothing in this world could ever exist
Without it’s opposite
There has to be a sun and moon
A man and a woman
And that’s just the way it is
Humanity’s lop sided
And everyone’s fightin’
How do we restore the peace
Mother earth is hurtin’
And everyone is searchin’
For the feminine energy

        The doors of the auditorium open to the students being adult men and women. India goes and takes her place standing in her place as a teacher, much like that scene in Lean On Me where the teachers stood in the isle. She has an envelope in hand.

Chorus:

When you talk to her talk to her
Like you want somebody else to talk to your mama (Watch your mouth, yeah yeah)
Don’t get smart with her have a heart to heart
With her just like you would with your daughter
Cause everything you do or say
You gotta live with it everyday
She’s somebody’s baby
She’s somebody’s sista
She’s somebody’s mama

        The camera would pan over the “students” matching each line of the Vamp. A brother stands up to fight when a guy says something to his sister, you see usual teen behavior at an assembly; paper throwing, joking, etc.

Vamp

When you talk to her talk to her
Like you want somebody to talk to your mama
Just like you fight for your sister
If you knew that somebody dissed her
How you gonna care for your daughter
Turn around and talk bad about her mama
Same way you listen to your auntie
Never interrupt while she speaks
Make your words sweet like candy
As if you were talking to your granny yeah

        The male principal is on stage speaking as he looks up and locks eyes with India. He smiles, continues the speech to the “students”. This would even be an amazing time to have cameos from the Lean On Me cast…lol

If you really love her then (say so)
If you really need her then (say so)
Love the way she thinks (say so)
You love the way she speaks (say so)
When you need some good conversation (say so)
Say so (say so)
If you want her in your life (say so)
You want her to be your wife (say so)
Tell her she’s your best friend (say so) (alright)
You’ll be there to the end (alright)(say so)

        Camera pans in on India looking at the envelope in her hand which is suggested to have been a resignation letter and she tears it in half.  Principal dismisses the students and seen goes to everyone filing out of the auditorium and leaving the school building. One of the other female teachers playfully hits her as she walks to the curb.

If you’re thinking about leaving (say so)
If you wonder where she’s going (say so)
If you need to breathe with her (say so)
You just want to be with her (say so)
If you love her hair (say so)
If you want her there (say so)
Tell me if you really want her (say so)
You wanna slap her down (say so)
Say so…
(You better not hit no woman, you done bumped yo’ head)
If you feel like loving (say so)
If you wanna feel the hugging (say so)

        A car pulls up and in the driver seat is a man who she leans in and kisses on the cheek and the car pulls off.

        Yeh…. that’s exactly how I pictured it. But who am I…. just a borderline obsessed fan.. and I mean that in the MOST respectful, “no restraining order needed” kind of way. I think that India, in all of her beauty, both vocally and physically would make my vision so beautiful. But she needs no help in that department. I pray she is as strong and direct and humble as I perceive her to be. I see God in her….And that is all that I have to say about that. Enjoy!

P.S.~ Check out my other post called 200 Men Said…. Oedipus’ Words. It is apart of my 200 Men Said…. series where I asked the men if they’ve ever said something to a woman that they wouldn’t want anyone to say to their mother. The answers will surprise you.

Sincerely,

~*My Mother’s Daughter*