~*2Deep*~

Posts Tagged ‘engage’

Love and Hip Hop~The Finale But Not the End

In Take 2: Film/TV Reviews on 2 May 2011 at 8:39 pm

 

Episode 1: Should’ve Called It Rap

Episode 2: Basketball Jump-offs Set to Music

Episode 3: Hater to the Left of Them

Episode 4: Willie Lynch’s Dream

Episode 5: High School Clicks

Episode 6: Indignant Proposal

Episode 7: Family Affair

Episode 8: Finale

 

Okay, after last week’s episode I really just want to set Fab’s balls on fire! but since I would get arrested for such an attempt, I will just say that he is not a real man. Not much else I can say…ready for this week’s episode. Oh Yeh, Olivia’s manager…. he’s still a bitch! Let these people talk. GROW THE FUCK UP! Okay…showtime.

Take 2 in 5, 4, 3, 2, 2, 2, #MyMicSoundsNice Check 2

So, I was soooooo shocked when I found out that this was the Finale?!!!! Didnt I JUST start dogging this show out a few weeks ago? Isn’t SOmaya still a no name wannabe? Olivia a scared cling-on who sings beautifully? Emily the main side chick to Fab? Chrissy the headstrong rich in-house wifey?

Okay, Mama Jones…..sitcho (yes, sitcho)  Frankie-looking behind back, no disrespect….let this man live his life. And did Mama Jones just say that Chrissy didn’t know how to be family “orien-tated”? Families have orientations now?

I simply LOVE Chrissy’s red shoes!!!!!!!! Her style is on point at times.

Okay… Jim needs to teach a class on how to treat your woman. This walk and hotel room is gorgeous and sexy!

And I know that I don’t know everything that is going on in their relationship…..btu from the snippet of what I see, this man is showing you the way that HE loves you. Not the way you want him to love you, but the way that he KNOWS how to love. The ONLY time you should complain is if he isn’t loving you the way you NEED to be loved. Wanting and Needing him to love you a certain way are two totally different things. Pick your battles.

Okay, I am all for a strong black woman, but Chrissy is making it hard for the rest of us. Honey, you never give a man an ultimatum. I repeat, you NEVER give a man an ultimatum!!!!! You played your hand and gave him the power when you stepped out of your role and proposed to him. If he wasnt moving at your pace….take a break and if he wants you…he will find you.  BUT I SWEAR IF I SEE YOU IN THE STREET I AM PUNCHING YOU IN THE THROAT!!!!!! Strong women dont propose to a man! WHERE FUCK DO THEY DO THAT AT?!!!!! We are strong enough to make the man come to us, and if the one we want doesnt come, move on to the next one. If he doesnt know if he wants to marry you after 6 years, then nothing you can say will make him marry you in another two if he doesnt damn well please. OH MY BLOOD IS BOILING BECAUSE OF THIS!

Ummmmm, Mashonda seems to smile every time that Emily comes and tells her that her relationship with Fab is shaky. I am not saying she is happy to hear the news, but she does have this subtle grin on her face. If I’m lying…replay the tape. Maybe it is just the way her face is, either way…a smile/smirk is on her face.

What is up with Somaya and this pleather, pink crop jacket? That jacket is so small  that it looks like her breasts are being smothered by a pack of fruity Bubbalicious bubble gum. And I wish that Somaya would stop hyping Jim Jones like that. See how yall gas people up. You were NOT gonna get mirked on television while the cameras were on. Point. Blank. Period. So please, stop testing my intelligence with your television thug act.  If he wanted to mirk you because he was a REAL thug, fuck a camera….he would be behind bars right now. End of story. So, not that we have all of this phony bullshit out of the way… NEXT! *Proceeds to buy Somaya clothes that fit her*

I am still laughing on the inside that Mama Jones is rocking a shirt that says, ” Idaho?” lmao! REALLY?!!!! She wants Chrissy to give Jim a baby? Tell that negro to marry her and she will give him a baby. That’s how I see it. So until your son is ready to make it official so that his child wont be a bastard child….you wont get a grandchild.

I need to have a sleepover at my house with my girls. I mean, damn! This sleepover should have been called Breast Fest.But I find it hilarious that Chrissy is in a onesie with the footies…lls. And wait….did Emily just say that she thought that most of Fab’s songs were about her? Which one? PLEASE LET ME KNOW so I can go back and analyze.

Wait…that’s it?!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

My conclusion on the entire season? Ummmm, I am just as confused now as I was when I first started watching. I want our celebs to do better for themselves. They have been allotted the opportunity to have a better life than most and they are still behaving as if they live in the projects and push a hood-rich decked-out Honda. I expect more. I feel like they are wasting what they have. Again, I say they are nothing but glorified niggers. You will only make me change my opinion when they change their behavior. Not asking them to be role models, but I am asking them to do better for themselves.  I have a feeling that they will be back for a second season. By then, I pray that these women will learn to step their self-esteems up a notch to the point where they wont have to wait on a man, cling to a group, complain about a man, and claim to be more than what they are. I pray that some things happen in the meantime. I know it wont be worth entertainment for them to improve themselves, but I do pray for them to improve.

Sincerely,

~My Mother’s Daughter*~

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Love and Hip Hop~Family Affair

In Take 2: Film/TV Reviews on 26 April 2011 at 1:00 am

 

Episode 1: Should’ve Called It Rap

Episode 2: Basketball Jump-offs Set to Music

Episode 3: Hater to the Left of Them

Episode 4: Willie Lynch’s Dream

Episode 5: High School Clicks

Episode 6: Indignant Proposal

Okay, you all should already know that I am on pins and needles to write about this show. Today has proven to be a good day in the first place. First…. I freed up some space in my daily planner, watched some people act unprofessional in the wake of that decision…and then I purchased a Nook. Yes, a Nook! Forget the ignant (yes, ignant) sons of bitches in the day…the Nook took the cake. And then I hosted a poetry open mic that had the best audience ever!!! I mean, I have been blessed with the best audiences lately…but I digress.

Okay… too much excitement going on in the course of my day to recap you, so you will have to click the links above. Let’s get to the goods!

Take 2 in 5, 4, 3, 2, 2, 2, #Proposal

So, I must confess in my rather sober state….Chrissy is slowly growing on me. But dont repeat it. This is between you and I…okay.

DAMN!!!!! Mama Jones’ face just hit the floor with that proposal. If I could film Nancy’s face…. I would sell it on eBay. Awwwwwww but Jim said yeh!!!! Awwww, my heart goes out to him and Chrissy. He is such a man’s man. And yes…. I agree with Chrissy, “what the fuck does ‘I’m witchu’ mean?” Jimmy… you didn’t say yes you will marry her. But I disagree with Chrissy, I will wait for my guy to propose to me. I’ll never propose to a guy.

And why is it that Nancy is punking everyone? How come no one can hold her back? She weighs all of 2 nuts sacks and a crack pipe…but no one can control or block her? LMAO!!! That was just funny to watch. And Nancy, with all due respect…parents arent always told, they are sometimes surprised like everyone else. And the only time the parents are told is if the son is asking for the daughter’s hand in marriage. This is unconventional, hence the unconventional method of not telling the parent.

LMAO! Jimmy said “I’m still here. My clothes are still upstairs” lmao! I like the way he thinks. He put Chrissy’s complaining in perspective. And then…. CHRISSY!!!!! Chrissy, boo, don’t give a man an ultimatum. YOU proposed to HIM!!! If he would have said no in front of everyone you would have been hurt and embarrassed.  So he saved face and then you need to wait and give him time to accept what you placed on his table. Dont rush it now.

Now….First off, last time we heard Somaya’s song, it wasnt finished…and now she somehow found the money to do a video? Who is funding this? Not to be all up in her purse straps like that, but is she still sleeping in the loft above the studio? And wow… Emily just can’t get enough of the drama…. I would have stayed away from Somaya. Point. Blank. Period. And yeh, this whole entire going on the internet to start a beef. Be the bigger woman, take the higher road and let the shit be. I hate simple-minded females who wont accept that they were wrong, and they get a whole bunch of other simple minded females to back them up. Grow up!!!!! That’s about a stupid as people writing subliminal Facebook statuses about people they  are mad about…lol. When you are right, you live with that. You let the hater shit roll off your back and you keep it going. Only basic bitches harbor on that stuff. It is quite comical if you ask me. But…..I digress.

And JIM AND THIS NEW SONG…… PRICELESS!!! This song about Chrissy is amazing!!! And the way that Jim confesses his love on National TV…. I continue to applaud him for being a man. I can not say that enough.

Wow!!! Fabolous didn’t even want to be in the family portrait with them just because the cameras were going to be around. And I am not going to talk about anyone’s kid…but her son is in need of a time out. And Fab didn’t even pick up the phone when she called? Wow….. I want to sympathize with her because her home life isn’t the prettiest…or at least that is how it is portrayed…but I have a problem with women who just wont get up and leave. Not to compare, but I will….Jim kisses, loves, and confesses his love for Chrissy in damn near EVERY episode of this show. His boys may pick on him, Olivia may joke, but that doesn’t make Jim any less of a man. Hell, it makes him sexy as hell and a model for what real men should do when they are in love. So, if Fab loves Emily… why can’t he step out into the light and claim his family? I really have a problem with this Skeletor looking motherfucker right now. I will send prayers of strength out to Emily, because no one deserves to be treated like that. She better start raising her Kelly Pitts emergency funds.

Okay, so I know that Rich is upset….but for a man to go off on a woman for ANY reason….you are not a man. Again….Rich, with your trying to be hard as hell bullshit….let it go. You are feeding into this. The fact that you are getting upset about a no name wanna be rapper is proving that she has the power to get under your skin. POW! She wins!!! Grow the fuck up. Again, this mess drives me nuts. Punk asses! Yeh… I said it, let the shit go. And I’m done.

Sincerely,

~My Mother’s Daughter*~

Love and Hip Hop~ Indignant Proposal

In Take 2: Film/TV Reviews on 19 April 2011 at 12:02 am

Episode 1: Should’ve Called It Rap

Episode 2: Basketball Jump-offs Set to Music

Episode 3: Hater to the Left of Them

Episode 4: Willie Lynch’s Dream

Episode 5: High School Clicks

Okay, so I am sitting here with my diva @Shinin_Light and I am introducing her to this show… yes, I can’t watch this by myself. I would love to hear what she has to say about this. Comedy is in my near future.

Take 2 in 5, 4, 3, 2, 2, 2,2 #MyMicSoundsNice check 2

Oh Lord…..Jim Jones can’t take care of the dog, House? Dont Mike Vic the dog!!!. And yeh… House is a huge ass dog. Ewwwwwww! House pooped inside of the store and Jim didn’t clean it up. Yuck!! Chrissy, you are a better woman than I could ever be on that on. I would have told him to clean his poo up. *bad taste in my mouth*

I love how Oliva tested my intelligence and thought that she had to define “listening party”. Ok, so she said that it is for the purpose of getting to know the “real” Olivia. I am glad that something is going to let us get to know her…. because so far all I have seen is who Olivia can morph into whenever a new crew comes around. And like her manager Rich said….”Wal-Mart is accepting apps”….should she not know how to stay out of mess and focus more on her music.

Okay, so, you [Chrissy] have been with Jim Jones for 6 years, but your man has not proposed to you so you feel like you have to step up? That man is one of the manliest(sp) men I know….and you will take that role away from him? And I mean, really, Chrissy… you sat there and you listened to Olivia as to what to do about this? This is the same bitch that lied about dating another man? Oh Lord… please don’t ever let me be that desperate enough to ever feel like I have to ask a man to marry me. *Sigh* I am not the biggest Chrissy fan, but my inner feminist is screaming “Bitch, you better not”. THIS is why men say you better not talk to your single friends about shit. Even @shinin_light just said that Chrissy went to Olivia because she knew that she would say what she wanted to hear, and that was a yes. Sad…lol. Please don’t go through with it.

*Takes a drink of my alcohol*  I had to drink to watch this week. *@shinin_light pours Moscato*

First off… Chrissy can’t keep her balance….lol. Second,this is funny as shit! But really? You are thinking of performing a burlesque routine in front of Jim Jones’ FAMILY?!!!! And then you picked out the ring too? Wow….. this ring is gorgeous. But of course the jeweler would tell her that “men need a push to get things done”. Girl, he just wants your money, all $12K of it.

Now, Olivia, honey… really? I can’t even comment on this. You are holding grudges over bullshit. THIS is why it appears that you don’t have any friends. Just hear the girl [Emily] out and then tell her to not do it again. I mean, didn’t you JUST make it into this click? But at least you can sing…because you can sing yourself all the way to the bank….but you need to let all of the negativity go. Take it from me, your personality will preceed you. Now, if your boob falls out of that halter dress… I am posting that pic. lol. Oh snap… Tocora was in the audience. Cool.

Ummmm.. Olivia, you said “funest”? Really? Hmmmm… Hooked on Stupid, worked for me.

And I thought that my breasts were huge…but I think Chrissy may have me beat! lol. You better work it for the Big Titty Committee, diva!!!!

WOW!!!! Was Chrissy really thinking of dancing in just the lace outfit? I am glad that she is going against doing the burlesque side of it. Yeh, diva… YOU deserve better….fuck Jim… you deserve to be taken seriously…lol. But you also deserve a man who will not hesitate for one second when it comes to asking you to marry him. I know I clown you out in all of my blogs, but I seriously want every woman to stand their ground and never have to propose to a man. Remember, men so what they want to do while women do what they must. If he hasnt done it… he wasnt ready; end of story. *Sigh* I have so much to say on that, but wont. Just know that every time a woman proposes to a man, a hoodrat gets its cheese.

LMAO!!! Mama Jones is a trip! And the way that Olivia tried to shut her up with the wine . But wow… .I hate how they cut off the proposal. Did Jim say yes? What is going on!!! Okay… I didnt get to clown on this episode as hard as I would like. In the famous words of Hancock, “I’ve been drinking, bitch” hahahaha. But I am proud of Chrissy for sticking to her guns and doing it in a classy manner. That much I do approve of. But Lawd knows that I cant wait til next week. Hmmmm…..And Scene.

Want to watch the episode that you missed? CLICK HERE.

Sincerely, 

~*My Mother’s Daughter*~

200 Men Said….Liars, and Fires, and Men….Oh MY!

In 200 Men Said.... on 15 March 2011 at 12:02 am

        If you read my post yesterday about Marsha Ambrosius’ I Hope She Cheats On You, then you should be more than well prepared to know what today’s blog will be about. You guessed it; Cheating! Well, not just cheating in general but all of the things that hurt people do to others while in a relationship.

        You know the drill; boy meets girl, boy sleeps with girl, boy cheats on girl, girls gets even, girl sleeps with best friend, etc, etc, etc. Yeh. If you are above the age of 16 and have a single cool bone in your body then you know exactly what I am talking about. Sorry, this blog is not for the 40 year-old virgins who play Scrabble by themselves while watching reruns of Golden Girls in their studio apartments. NO, this is for the cool kids who know how to get even. Those kids who actually got asked out on dates and thought it was a privilege. The same kids who would soon find out that we are in an age where no one knows how to date or even respect themselves, yet alone how to protect someone else! Yes, those kids.

       I, dear friends, was one of THOSE kids. The cool kid that experienced every wrong in the book. I’m one of the divas with the sunroof open, windows do, and blaring I Hope She Cheats On You. No hurt feelings, just vindication at its finest, displayed beautifully by Marsha’s amazing talents.

       So, as usual, i wanted to know…or even see for that matter…what my 200 men thought on the matter. I wanted to first see what they would admit to doing. So I asked them:

What was the WORSE thing, as a man, that you have ever done to a woman while in a relationship?

 

And the answers that followed were:

  • MR. LOVING: I can’t find anything that I can recall! [2deep: Suuuuuuuure! lol]
  •  Carlos V: cheated
  •  ! Robert D (S4D (S-4411): GAVE MY HEART [2deep:  OUCH!!!!!]
  •  Boozer101: cheated… she didn’t find out but just the same.. that’s the worse thing I’ve ever done
  •  Lighta: Revenge cheat would have to be the worst thing.
  • JAY D:  Cheat on her
  •  Nigi “Pistol Star” Pu Yi: The 5th [2Deep:  I have a feeling that there will be a ton of this….lol]
  • Patrick:  Not giving the affection she needed or deserved. [2Deep:  You do know that this is worse than cheating, right?]
  •  Lateef25: maybe i wasnt honest
  • Juan D: smashed her friend. [2deep: Hope it itched….lol]
  •  Code Name Bigsexy: lol ill have to use my fifth amendment on that 1 [2Deep: You already told me… so I know…lmao! I just wont post it.]
  • DSMILEY1: Had sex with a girl while my girlfriend at the time was next door to a friend’s house. I WAS JUST STUPID AT THE TIME BUT NEVER WILL DO IT AGAIN [2Deep:  JUST STUPID!!! I hope you caught something. Oh wait, you didnt do this to me….never mind…lmao]
  •  Parrish M: I couldn’t say that I was a man at the time more like an adult male. I put my hands on a woman before. [2deep: Check out my Blog About D.O.C……..yeh]
  • rroyallty: hmm. not sure. maybe break up with her
  • Johann J: I cheated on her with her best friend and her best friends cousin. A real young and dumb move. [2Deep: Just a regular overachiever, aren’t we?]
  • Robert P: Wasn’t there for her when she needed me most
  • Tori A: Cheated on her [2Deep:  Let me guess… you cheated….lmao!]
  • James F: had sex with her cousin or kickin her out the car and she had to find a another way home [2Deep:  I’m ready to come whoop your ass my damn self. WHO DOES THAT SHIT?!]
  •  kuerby E: cheat…..
  •  Ryu C-Keyz:  probably cussed her out and walked off for the night. Hey, I’m the type you snap at me, I snap back. I don’t sit back and take it.
  •  Allen Ozark:  nothing. I am the world’s last remaining humanist and a perfect gentleman. i have a universal dimmer switch that only works one way – brighter and brighter – wear your shades baby, wear your shades. [2deep: *side eye* *raised eyebrow*]
  • Terrance L:  cheated sexy, what about you as a woman in a relationship [2Deep:  Negro, this isn’t about me…lol]
  •  Mr. U. G. Bilbo: The worse thing I’ve done was flirted with another woman and got her number while my girlfriend was around me
  •  Ed M:  talk back; being a smart ass [2Deep: Was this your mother? lmao….you are allowed to be a smart ass.]
  •  Mr.Swaggtastikal:  I LIED AND TOLD MY EX THAT I WAS STILL WORKING WHEN I KNEW I GOT FIRED…. [2deep: It wasnt so bad to be fired… it’s the fact that you lied that made it bad. CONFESS MAN!!!]
  • *~ MR SPONTANEOUS ~PEACE*!!: Betrayed her by not telling her i was still legally married but has been separated for over a year….. [2Deep: I shall remain silent…..but know I am thinking something]
  • ~Taylor Gang~Jay Kahlifa:  cheat….and that was the biggest mistake i ever made in my life [2Deep:  I’m sorry… the bitter bitches couldn’t hear you. Could you please speak up. lol]
  • 6’5 & NICE WIT IT: GAVE THE DUMMY A CHANCE TO BE IN A RELATIONSHIP [2Deep:  Playing devil’s advocate here… but what does that make you for giving the chance? lmao! j/k]
  • corey: fake the big O.lol [2Deep:  Can guys even do this? WHY? I applaud you for evening admitting it. lmao!]
  • Ddouble R: put [her] out of my car with her bags in tow at the Maryland house. [2deep: *Researches Marland House…… YOU DROPPED HER OFF AT A REST STOP LOCATED IN THE CENTER OF I-95?!!!!!! I HOPE YOU GET HIT BY TRAFFIC!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *wooosah* Okay… this was in the distant past…. I hope.)
        Okay… so there are a ton of cheating guys running around. KEEP HOPE ALIVE LADIES!!!! *Turns on Disney movies* I mean really… I was done at a guy admitting to faking an orgasm. I mean… what purpose would that serve? Did she find out that he faked the orgasm? Did you tell her that you came? How horrible was she sexually that you had to fake it? Was she ugly? Was she loose and you found out one it was time to lay it down and it turned you off? DId you fake it to speed up the process? Oh shit, I am way off topic… .but that one stumped me. lmao
 
        Also, I see that there are a ton of simple bitches walking along the highway. It would have been a Chris Brown Rhianna situation going on in that car if a negro EVER tells me that I have to get out and walk. He would have to physically put me out and then I am pressing charges and causing a scene. Who does that?!!!! *blood boiling* I know I asked for honesty…. but damn it I got it. Just ticks me off. So… to help me get over this part, I asked them to tell me this:
What was one of the WORST things that a female has done to you while in a relationship? How did it make you feel?

See ladies, I was fair….lol. The fellas said:

  • Tyrone E: Let her brother who was on drugs steal money and property from and protect him and say ‘o u know he got a problem” I was pissed and that is why she is an ex today
  • K-LUST THE WILDEST MOUTH!: HAVE MY DAUGHTER AROUND ANOTHER MAN! IT MADE ME WANNA KNOCK BOTH OF EM OUT!
  • !James!:  She went back to her ex, she say it was for the kids. She wanted me to stay in the background. I did and eventually she left him for her safety. It’s harder to trust, I keep 1 eye open at all times.
  • ”DUKE” BANNER: I WAS DOING OFF SHORE OIL RIGGING AND WHEN I LEAVE THIS SCOUNDREL WOULD BRING A JOE TO THE HOUSE I WAS MORE ASHAME BECAUSE ALL HE DID WAS DRINK STAYED WITH HIS MOTHER TALKING ABOUT SHE GOT HI AND SHE KNEW HIM AND IT STARTED FROM THERE
  • Tony Raymond **CANDIDA whores me**:  Cheat but i just come to learn ALL sexes knows what they WANT but never what they NEED…even if your mouth say you need this or that because they always go after what they want…
  • Tori A:  cheated on me w/ someone I [thought] was a good friend
  • DJ Urban Cowboy: My most recent ex took my phone and decided to rummage through my txts… Big no no in my book.
  • Kip S:  Forget my birthday after being in a relationship with me for over a year.

 

       You know what they say… hurt people, hurt people. Yes, some of this is funny to read, but it still doesn’t make ANY of it right. At what point are people going to be honest with themselves about what they want, what they need, and what the other person is offering. I think if hoes would admit to being hoes they could find each other. There are sugar daddies out there for the gold diggers, but leave the good boys and girls alone. Stick to your own kind. It is just point less for all of this to go on. We are just creating more hurt people all the while wondering why you can’t find a good one. YEs, I am prepared to fuck the chick(s) up who dare hurts my future husband… I will hunt you down! lol. TRY ME!

Okay, this is getting depressing, but it was an interesting write-up. Hope you enjoyed…. on to the next one.

Sincerely,

~*My Mother’s Daughter*~

Lyrically Speaking~ Marsha Ambrosius: I Hope She Cheats on You

In Lyrically Speaking on 14 March 2011 at 12:22 am

        Bitter bitches around the world could be heard slamming keypads to a point of no return as they Googled, Rhapsody searched, and iTunes bought Marsha Ambrosius’ ” I Hope She Cheats on You” from her album Late Nights and Early Mornings. Beyoncé’s “Put a Ring On It” deemed archaic…. I mean who wants that motherfucker now? NOT I!!! No, this song became the 2010 anthem as women purchased court side seats for their men as they pointed out just how nice Dwayne Wade’s ass looks in the middle of a lay-up.  Comments of  “I wonder if LeBron can take it to the hole for real” taunt him during half time. Yes, bitches!!! THIS IS WHY WE WATCH BASKETBALL!!!! Sports Center will never be the same. *Duh-nuh-nuh, Duh-nuh-nuh! lmao!

        I can see it now, Half-Time show brought to you by Bitter Bitches of America and sponsored by Midol. Performance by Marsha Ambrosius. All you hear are the snaps to the intro and out come these hooded figures snapping into formation, reminiscent of the Egyptian dancers in MJ’s Remember the Time. No one’s face is seen but Marsha as the formation is made behind her as she stands center court under a sole spotlight. All you can hear through the arena is:

Verse 1:
Ew whew ew whew oh oh
I hope she cheat on you wit’ a basketball playa.
Hope that she Kim Kardashian’ed her way up.
Don’t know the difference ‘tween a touchdown and a layup.
Got you on Viagra in order for you to stay up.

Pre-chorus:
I may sound bitter, I’m a little bitter, just a little bitter because you were wit’ her.
I’m Salt Lake City, now I’m up on out the picture.
Remember how it was when I was wit’ cha baby?
[Cues for mysterious dancers to drop their hoods]

Sex so good, do you remember oh baby? Sex so good do you remember oh?

        CROWD GOES WILD!!!!  Hoods are flipped back and Shaunie O’Neal can be seen leading Royce’s choreography! Yes, that’s right people…the entire cast of Basketball Jump-offs, I mean Wives, are center court, booty popping to their new ceremonial anthem! Being careful not to slip on their own tears, glass of water, wine or beverage of choice that has been thrown Evelyn-syle as a symbolic statement of I HATE YOU BITCH, TRY ME. They are in perfect harmony  as the chorus breaks out amongst the arena speakers.

Chorus:
Well look at how it all turned out now.
I hope she cheat on you with a basketball playa.
Look at how it all turned out now.
I hope you feeling lonely baby now we’re not together.
Look at how it all turned out now.
I hope she cheat on you with a basketball playa.
Look at how it all turned out now.
Ew now that I’m without cha.

        Aw shit! Just when you couldn’t get enough of Gloria’s “That’s What’s Up” wrist twists and Jennifer’s forehead…not to be outdone, on runs the cast of The Game to show these bitches how it is really done! Go Tasha! It’s ya Birthday! Call Pookie! Go Pow, Pow! Go Janay, It’s Ya baby’s Daddy! Work It Med School! Work it! Work it! Get Low Kelly, like your bank funds! lmao Yes, Jazz choreographed this portion of the great display of bitter bitches! DO THE TSUNAMI!!!!

Verse 2:
I hope she cheat on you wit an NFL baller.
She ignores you every single time you call her.
Brand new Louis, gotta have it spend your money on her.
When you wanna hit it she actin’ like she don’t wanna.

Pre-chorus:
I may sound bitter, I’m a little bitter, just a little bitter because you were wit’ her.
I’m Salt Lake City, now I’m up on out the picture.
Remember how it was when I was wit’ cha baby?
Sex so good, do you remember oh baby? Sex so good do you remember oh? (Baby)

 

        Then they all join together as if Disney knew that this would be a musical. The cast from Glee! just itching in their seats to get up and join in a higher octave; judgment spewing from their eyes as if to say “Sit down , bitches, and let the professionals do it.” But it has already continued without them. This is Annette Funicello meets Lena Horne in Baldwin Hills directed by Tyler Perry. It is classic SNL Tom foolery in the key of broken-hearted! ENTERTAINMENT PEOPLE!!!! And a 5, 6, 7, 8,…..

Chorus:
Well look at how it all turned out now.
I hope she cheat on you with a basketball playa.

Look at how it all turned out now.
Hope you feeling lonely baby now we’re not together.
Look at how it all turned out now.
I hope she cheat on you with a basketball playa.
Look at how it all turned out now.
Ew now that I’m without cha.

 

        And true to Chorus Line form, they each take turns accenting a line from the hook as banners of who did them wrong are dropped from the arena ceiling along with Kim Kardashian’s pic just because the bitch made the song hot. And no one argues about her placement in the song because its true. And she could care less as long as the check clears! With a 1 and a 2 and…..

Hook:
She cute and all, but that won’t last forever.
What I had for you was so much better.
Yeah the grass ain’t greener on the other side of town.
Now look at how it all turned out now.
I’m a little bitter, just a little bitter.
But I’m doing better, ’cause we ain’t together.
You sorry excuse for somebody I was into.
Remember what it was when I was wit’ you?

Chorus:
Look at how it all turned out now.
I hope she cheat on you with a basketball playa.
Look at how it all turned out now.
Hope you feeling lonely baby now we’re not together.
Look at how it all turned out now.
I hope she cheat on you with a basketball playa. (so sad cheated on you wit’ a basketball playa)
Look at how it all turned out now.
Now that I’m without cha baby.

  

        And for the closing finale, their children run out on the court doing the stanky leg while their divorce lawyers throw business cards into the crowd via the t-shirt shooter. They all start to do the dramatic , yet sexy slow walk with finger snaps off the court as Marsha  ad libs. And just as they hit the exit, you can see Juanita Jordan giving high fives to the women as they head back to the dressing room where security can protect them from their exes……lmao. NeNe Leaks can be seen trying to get an interview from the sidelines.

Ad-libs:
Yeah (yeah) yeah (yeah) yeah (yeah) heeeeyyyy yeah (x2)
Yeah (yeah) yeah (yeah) yeah (yeah) saaaannnnggg yeah
Yeah (yeah) yeah (yeah) Sing
(I hope she cheat on you)
I hope she cheat on you wit’ a basketball playa yeah.
Hope you feelin’ lonely now we’re not together baby.
Said I hope she cheat on you baby.

 

Yes….. this is how I envision it. This is how my head works. Dont judge me… you’re just mad because you didn’t think of it first! But serioiusly…. I am so glad that Marsha is back…and boy did she come back with a bang! You better believe that I am going to come back and review Far Away! This diva has us all wishing evil on our exes and his new girl…lol. But done so with a powerful voice that demands you pay attention and listen. Job well done, diva… I have NOTHING bad to say about this song.

Sincerely,

~*My Mother’s Daughter*~

 

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200 Men Said…Dueces Dos and Don’ts

In 200 Men Said.... on 1 March 2011 at 12:02 am

        If you checked out my blog yesterday, Lyrically Speaking: Keri Hilson~Intuition [<~Click Here] Then you would already know what this blog is going to be about.  Women have the best intuition skills on the face of this earth, but sometimes your signal could be off and you could blame a man who is doing something based on your own fears and insecurities. This is a No, No.  There are things that women think they are good at, or things that should occur in a relationship….and those very things could be the thing that breaks up the relationship.

        For instance, do we as women listen as much as we like to complain that men don’t listen to us? I would have to say that women are the WORST listeners. Men damn near are forced into listening and women are unaccustomed to doing so. SO, I thought that I would lay somethings out in front of you in plain view.

        We often times wonder if things were our fault when it comes to a relationship ending. Did we do something wrong? What could we have done better? Etc. But then we get into our pride, listen to our bitter ass girlfriends and fail to accept our part in a relationship going wrong. Most of the issue is that we didn’t listen to our partner or the warning signs that something was not going the way that it should, yet and still we pretended that all was gravy and ignored it. MISTAKE! We must face facts. And no matter how many hours we spend hovering over a box of Ben and Jerry’s we will always find ourselves blameless. So, I thought that I would ask my 200 Men the following question:

If there were 2 things that you could get women to do (or stop doing) in a relationship to make it work or last longer…what would those 2 things be and why? Send me a message for longer answers.

        Now before you read these answers, you have to be open and honest with yourself. Before you go any further I need you to make the promise that you will not negate a single one of these answers. These guys deal with women, therefore they know what has bothered them in a relationship. Are all of these responses going to be about you? No, not unless you have been with all of these guys. But SOMETHING in here will strike a chord and pinch a nerve and you have to be willing to face that fact and be ready to fix it, because if it is listed… then it is a problem.

And the 200 Men Said….

  • Vince V: sorry I don’t like this question…for one it automatically assumes that it is something that a woman does or doesn’t do that causes relationships to end. when we all that is not true. (just keeping it real) no two relationships r the same, every one ends for different reasons. but if you want to hear the general consensus of the male demographic, the answer to your question would be… be more explicitly sexual and open to diversity in the bedroom, and to domesticate themselves a little more (learn to cook and clean).
  • Nigi “Pistol Star” Pu Yi: Assuming 2 Much! And Needs 2 Communicate More!..Muahz..Pefect..lol
  • …….: Stop always acting like everything is about money,and stop acting like everything is about money lol
  • K-LUST THE WILDEST MOUTH!: WELL TWO THINGS ARE STOP ACCUSING A MAN OF BEING OUT WITH OTHER WOMEN AND SECOND , STOP BEING SILENT WHEN SOMTHING IS ON YOUR MIND!
  •  ICE: Shut up lol…and trust me 🙂
  • Lateef25: not be so dramatic and just think before you react
  • Aries Brotha: Stop boasting about the intimacy shared in the bedroom. And to stop agonizing about where the relationship is going. Boasting could lead her friends wanting to see what’s up. Relationships evolve so there isn’t really any way to plan the future.
  • Jerome P: i think women should not assume what a man knows.Tell him whats going on in your head. just because we dont know something about you doesn’t mean we’re not paying attention to you. We don’t pick up on everything so quickly
  •  James F: take care of her appearance and be a good listener
  • Code Name Bigsexy: 1 NO MALE FRIENDS.2 KNOW WE ARE A TEAM THAT MEANS I HELP YOU AND YOU HELP ME
  •  !: be satisfied with your man’s position in life if he is happy…In other words, if he makes 60000 and content why bash him for not wanting more, or dressing a certain way, etc…just like him for him or make a change in her life.
  •  !A Gentleman! (BBM:30A835CD): If I can get women to stop looking at me or guarding themselves as if I was the man who hurt them. Stop assuming you know us, every man is the not same, we’re not! we are all different.
  •  
  • THIS GUY: stop always trying to be right and stop trying to destroy another peaceful day
  • James L: To stop treating all guys like their cheaters because of their past relationship experience. You will run the good guy off. Say what you mean!!!! We can’t read between your lines, to many possibilities. Make it plain and simple what you want.
AND MY ALL TIME FAVORITE COMMENT CAN FROM :
  • Prestige “The One And Only”: Control your own confidence level. A man shouldn’t dictate a woman’s love for herself, if ever it gets to the point where I am the sole source of her believing in herself it becomes very unattractive. And never stop setting goals….
 
        I read that comment and I wanted to revert back to southern Baptist Church days. PREACH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Gone On And Tell ’em The TRUTH, PASSA! (Yes, I said Pass and not Pastor).  Don’t ask him if that dress makes you look fast. You knew you looked fat and wanted confirmation. Or you THOUGHT you looked fat and need to hear someone else say the words that mimic the thoughts in your head. That is NOT fair to him. You need a self-check. You need to be able to stand on your own. Confidence is sexy as shit! And the sooner you think you are beautiful is the same minute that the world will begin to agree with you. No self-denial can be included in this. So no obese chicks in 2-piece swimsuits because it doesn’t mean you are confident, that shows you are faking confidence.  Nor does it mean that the skinny girl who believes that she has the bomb as body should go around and show everyone. Think about it, some of the most valuable collections of the world are behind glass and locked up where no one can see it or have limited access. Why would you expose your treasure? You are worth being the first to know that you are beautiful and worth being loved. Love yourself first, trust me when I tell you it is a beautiful thing.
 
        Of course I agree with the intro to Vince V’s response and “……”‘s answer cracks me the hell up. But they all hold a good point in them. And even though ICE wants to get jumped… there is a point to his message as well. We must all learn to shut up SOMETIMES and listen just as much as we wish to be listened to.
 
       Aries Brotha makes a great point about boasting and being a bug-a-boo. Ladies… if you read my Advice from the Other Woman blog you would know that you don’t tell your friends SHIT!! If they ask, just say everything is good. Only stupid females and high school chicks share the details of their relationships. STOP IT!!! Your man is telling you that if you tell you must have wanted someone to know so you can’t get mad when he gives a private tutorial to your best friend…lmao. Just kidding, but you catch my drift. And bugging him about where the relationship is headed is a sign that you are desperate. Seriously. If he wants you, you will know it. if you have to ask, then he doesn’t want you. Make yourself less available and show him that you have a life to live with or without him. If he can’t live without you….he’ll be back. So relax ladies, your asking is why your relationships keep failing. Your overall problem is talking, so shut up to your friends and to your man when it comes to where this relationship is headed… lmao. Well, do so in moderation.
 
      And of course, the Bag Lady Effect. Boo, leave Tyrone’s issues with Tyrone. Keith didn’t hurt you, he may in the future, but you dont know that yet. Pain hurts but it makes us stronger. Imagine how many times iron has to be melted, molded, and hit over and over again to get it to a point where it holds up structures, becomes the frame for others. It feels like you are dying, but you wont. TRUST ME! I’ve been through some shit and I am still here. You are not afraid of Love. You are afraid of being hurt by Tyrone. Well you left Tyrone. Be able to think logically and not emotionally so much. This is nothing new. We’ve heard it all before. Now is the time to believe it and understand the effects of it. The men you seek do NOT like these behaviors. If there are things that you want them to change, you too have to be more willing to change the things about you that bother them. But I’m just a girl too. I suggest to myself that I need to follow my advice. And Scene!
 
Sincerely,
~*My Mother’s Daughter*~

Lyrically Speaking: Keri Hilson~ Intuition

In Lyrically Speaking on 28 February 2011 at 12:13 pm

        A man’s arch nemesis has been and will ALWAYS be a woman’s intuition. I think it was apart of the deal when he snatched Adam’s rib. His rib contained 10% of Adam’s DNA which was a divine tracking device and lie detector. It lets the woman know when something isn’t right even when she can’t quite put a finger on it. I can’t describe it, but it is the oddest feeling in the entire world. She could just be sitting there when all of a sudden something tells her to call her man…..while on the other side of town he is getting his freak on with her best friend. Yes, it is like a face off between Batman and the Riddler. It is just this feeling…..

        And as I thought about this topic… one of my favorite songs came to mind. Keri Hilson’s “Intuition”. Yes, this song just screams “I am woman, hear me roar. I know you did wrong, negro don’t play me. Now pack your shit and bounce.” hahahaha I don’t know if that was her intention when she wrote it, but that became my subtext when I heard it. I think it is all even, right? I mean… I know for a fact that EVERY woman pleading Intuition isn’t on the right path, but for the other 99.999999% of us who listen to our intuition for the right reasons, we are hardly ever wrong. A wise woman once told me that our intuition is God snitching on the universe. What an image, right…. but it works. So I go with my gut feelings majority of the time and I am right.

        Now this song has a taste of both Indian and Asian instrumentation to it, and I think that would be a great place to start with my interpretation of the video.

        I think that the video should start with Keri asleep in bed. As her man grabs the keys off the dresser and you see the door closing behind him.

“Intuition”

Whoa [3x]

Hey hey…

Keri pops up in bed and begins to look around. She leans over and looks out the window as she sees him backing out of the driveway.

[Chorus]
I got this crazy feeling
I’m gone be single again
I know it, I can feel it
I know you gone mess up

        Keri gets out of bed and walks to throw on an Asian designer trench coat with a fidora, glances in the mirror by the front door, grabs her keys and hops in her car.

Wow, you really turn me on
So I, I really hope I’m wrong [whoa]
It would break my world If you ain’t true to me, yea
But I’m not the silly girl I used to be
And I Know how it goes yea

       She comes to a light and sees his car outside of a massage parlor. Shot switches to her walking through the parlor looking for her guy. She catches him getting a massage in one of the rooms and she rubs her hands down his back. He pops up to look around but Keri is gone and in her car back home

[Pre-Chorus]
Dude’s out here think they slick
Got a lot of girls on they (dadadadada)
And they can’t say no
Steady telling me they ain’t you
I’ma wait to see what you gone do
Hope you know you got a good thing, yea

[Chorus]
I got this crazy feeling
I’m gone be single again
I know it, I can feel it
I know you gone mess up

I got this crazy feeling
I’m gone be single again
I know it, Its gone happen
I know you gone mess up

       Fast forward technique to push the story ahead a few hours. Scene stops at Keri fighting with a guy while she is wearing a kimono. The fight is brief and he walks out of the house. With Keri walking along the window of the house. Shot cuts to Keri walking along the glass window of an Asian restaurant with her “guy” sitting at a dinner table obviously waiting for someone for dinner. She is on her Inspector Black Chick trying to get a better view of him. The entire restaurant is filled with guys sitting at tables by themselves with an all female staff.

I, I love the way we fight so
So, I hope this is all in my mind (hope it’s in my mind)
Baby don’t you know
It would break my world, if you ain’t true to me yea
But I’m not the silly girl I used to be
See I know how it goes

       The servers in the restaurant and random  staff members throughout the dining area join in for choreography. Some women are private detectives with cameras and notepads. The servers are performing choreography around the guy’s table that they are servicing, every guy but Keri’s. The servers collect glasses, and utensils CSI style and places them in an evidence bag, placed back on the serving tray and exit the dining area.

[Pre-Chorus]
Dude’s out here think they slick
Got a lot of girls on they (dadadadada)
But they don’t say no
Steady telling me they ain’t you
I’ma wait to see what u gone do
Hope you know you got a good thing cause I,

[Chorus]
I got this crazy feeling
I’m gone be single again
I know it, I can feel it
I know you gone mess up

I got this crazy feeling
I’m gone be single again
I know it, Its gone happen
I know you gone mess up

 

        Then you see everything go pitch black, when a spotlight pops up over one guy like an interrogation lamp. Keri walks up to the two-way window and her silhouette is seen dancing directly in front of her guy. Snippets of individual female detectives come into the light surrounding him.

Your gonna get too comfortable (you gone mess up)
Gonna want something new babe (you gone mess up)
Your gonna be just like the rest (you gone mess up)
It’s gonna be you babe before me

         They release him and he is free to leave. Keri is seen in a designer trench coat walking behind him out of the police station.  He gets to his car and pulls off before her. She runs to her car and speeds off.

I trust my heart, broke down my guard
I worked so hard to take good care of you

I trust my heart, broke down my guard
I worked so hard, I hope it ain’t true

       Keri begins to say this next part into her rear view mirror. She pulls up next to him, glances over, and then runs through a red light and he stops. She makes it home before him.

Look at me
You wanna miss all this?
Go ‘head
Bring that back
Whoa [3x]

        As he reaches for the front door, Keri opens it in her Kimono and takes his hand to lead him upstairs.

 

It’s in my mind
Whoa [3x]
Hope its in my mind

        There is a pan in shot of a photo in her bag of him sitting at the table in the restaurant by himself and then a figure of a woman fades into view in the chair across from him. She has on a fidora to cover her face and the video ends.

        Yeh…I know. Wild and all over the place. But this has that Carmen San Diego feel about it. A woman detective going on a hunch. That inner voice telling her that something isn’t right. And though she may not have the proof… it’s there. So, that was my take on it…. did you like it?

       Check back tomorrow when I ask my 200 Men about the 2 things they wish that women would stop doing. How does that tie into intuition? Well, we already know as women what we want guys to stop or start doing…so why not hear from them. Maybe these are the things that make them misbehave which in turn peaks our intuition.  [Will insert Link here]

        Scroll Down to leave a comment or read comments. If you are on the Homepage, click the title of this individual blog to see or leave a comment.

Sincerely,

*My Mother’s Daughter*~

Deep Kamasutra: “Orally Speaking”

In Cupid & Other Myths on 5 October 2010 at 10:16 am

Welcome to the new series called “Deep Kamasutra” featuring advice giving to you from myself, 2Deep, and my homeboy Kamasutra. I guarantee you that this will be blunt advice unlike anything that you have ever read before. He and I are two very blunt individuals…..so if you don’t want the truth DO NOT READ ANY BLOG ENTRIES FROM THIS SERIES!!! lol.  So…lets get this party started.

Our first question for the start-up of this series comes from a Twitter follower, who happens to be a black male, and he asks:

“Why is it that black women do not EASILY engage in oral sex, or engage in the act as much as other races?”

 

Kamasutra, what are your thoughts, sir?

        It’s Kamasutra on the ones and twos. I have had a lot of experience in the field of women. And I will tell you this, the freakiest woman in the world, at some point, will evolve into someone who cares about her image and doesn’t want her business put out there in the streets. Now with that said, I believe that the black race has been so mind fucked that the whole situation of black love and dating is fugazi (that’s military lingo for fucked up)! On to your question, from my experiences with various races of women, the stigma for giving “head,” sucking dick, giving brains, and ultimately fellatio all comes down to three things: desiring to please her man by any means necessary, the stigma in the community for what that actually involves, and the last one is just plain what her mother told her, bro.

         I’m not going to even try to make this eloquent or technical, I am just going to keep it real! Getting your dick sucked is arguably one of the best feelings in the world, so who wouldn’t want to experience that feeling? Black women don’t come up off the goods easily because their mothers tell them that its nasty and no self-respecting woman would take her mouth and open it up and allow a man to slide his dirty dick in between her lips. What she didn’t tell her daughter is that she was breaking daddy off with the bomb ass head last night and many of her former boyfriends before daddy was even in the picture! In our community, dick sucking is scandalous and derogatory and no woman wants to have that as her reputation. Honestly, black men talk too damn much and that is real, certified talk. They tell their friends and their friends tell their friends and then ultimately someone tries to get that “fire dome” from her and now the reputation precedes her. And oh man, don’t let her turn him down, he will shred her image to pieces trying to salvage what little manhood he has left from picking his face up off the ground—all because she said no. It’s a defense mechanism my dude! They give head but most of them enjoy the act, but they are not going to divulge that information to you!

          You ever heard the saying, “A woman will fake an orgasm to save a relationship, but a man will fake a relationship just to get an orgasm.” That’s real and women know it, so a woman isn’t going to give you something she feels like, for one, he isn’t even my man and, two, he is going to go runteldat! It’s all an image thing!

 ~Kamasutra

Wow! Okay. It’s always interesting to see what guys think about a subject. Now, ladies…. its my turn.For starters, I plead the 5th on my own personal experience….I am merely discussing the topic. Now that we’ve got that out of the way…lol .

        

         As I got older, I had an ex call me and ask for my permission to tell his current girlfriend that he and I had sex,and if I had disagreed I would have been omitted out of his confession…..that makes a woman feel safe, that makes a woman keep a man on her radar, that could make a woman drop to one or two knees to show you how much she appreciates you for your thoughtfulness. And now that my professional career has reached, and continues to reach, new heights I search for guys who like to keep their life just as private as I like to keep mine. Yes, I tell a lot about myself but there are things that will never be broadcasted, like if I have sex, when I have sex…and what is included in the sexual package.  And just because I have a tongue ring, doesn’t mean that I got it to play “head” games, or that you will ever get to experience it. The ones who get the most excited are the ones who wont get anything from a female. It is the laid back brothers ( or at least the ones who can fake until they make it) who make those females who engage in giving head feel like their secret is safe. So, trying to impress your boys could actually decrease the actions that you so desire.

        If it were up to my grandmother, all actions are a go! She was very open and honest with me about sex, so I never got the speech about how giving head could cause you cancer. lol. In my house, the only rule of thumb was don’t get pregnant. With all of the openness that surrounded me there wasnt much of a mystery surrounding sex that made me want to rush out and dabble in it, and that very openness kept me a virgin until I was twenty. In high school just about every guy in my school was trying to holler at me all because I was unobtainable, and I liked it that way. But the very same lure that they wanted me for was the very same lure that kept me a virgin; there were no rumors of a past triste floating around about what I had done. Yet, I am sure you will find a female out there who is less timid than myself. Like my high school best friend use to say, “Dick doesn’t have a face.” So why don’t you ask her to take my place…lol. Or this chick… she seems ready for the job:

        LMBO!!!! All jokes aside, my homegirl brings up an interesting point when she says, “If its clean, I suck. If he’s been tested, I swallow.” lmbo!  Blunt, yet so very honest. As a woman, you have to protect yourself from viruses, and going down on a guy puts us at risk. Point, blank, period. We hear, and experience, the actions of the Down Low brothers, and unless you stop complaining about receiving oral pleasure while wearing a condom….I guess you will have to wait til you are married. The very actions of guys actually scares women off from feeling comfortable. Because it doesn’t make me feel comfortable knowing that 30% of males don’t think that getting “head” is considered having sex. And 100% of that 30% do NOT use oral condoms when receiving “head” which means that the opportunity for viruses to be transmitted raises through each action….and then he expects me to turn around and follow suit? Ummm…come again?  So, no amount of social stigma can compete with the hard facts of a male’s sexual prowess and the risky activities that go along with those actions.

        As a female, I have to agree with Kamasutra on the topic of reputation and self-respect. Fellas, you all do talk far too much and end up setting fire to the very bridge that a girl may have crossed in order to give you such pleasure. No girl wants to be known as the local hoe. She wants to be considered as a lady at all times, no matter her actions, and you spreading the word actually kills that image. Also, having the pressure of a guy’s expectation actually kills the mood.Just like you don’t want a woman who you’ve been with for a month to expect you to marry her, I don’t want a guy who I have only been dating for a month to expect that he should get some head out of the deal. It can’t be a double standard. Besides, why would you want a woman to easily give you anything….she could just as easily pass you a disease. Now, as a respectable woman, if I ever decide to engage in such an intimate act with a man, you can be guaranteed that he got that act because my heart was into the action and not just because it is expected of me. I guess only doing this with your husband would solve this issue. So in conclusion, just like every female hasnt earned the right for him to “put a ring on it”, every male hasnt earned the right for me to put my lips on it. Same thang! End of story.

~2Deep

 

So, i guess it boils down to the standards of the people engaging in such actions. If a guy knew that for SOME woman it is a sign of affection and if they appreciated it by keeping their damn mouths shut…they just may get it more often. But on the flip side, if girls understood that guys don’t think like us and are more apt to spreading the news, they wouldn’t be so swift in engaging in an action that would ruin your reputation. I think that it would be safe to say that this one will be a stalemate. Fellas, I’m sure you will find a female who will help you out, and ladies….I think it is up to you as to whether you want to take that risk or not.

Verdict: Hung Jury

Sincerely,

~Deep & Kamasutra~

P.S. If you liked this series and wish to see it continue, leave questions below in the comment section and it could show up in the next blog.  Follow Kamasutra’s blog by CLICKING HERE!

Follow us on Twitter:

2Deep: @_2Deep_

Kamasutra: @Yo_STFU_ImTalkn

Think Like a Hoe… Act Like a Lady

In XX Edition: About the Girls on 23 September 2010 at 9:42 am

 

        For ages our mothers have taught us to always be a lady in the street, while magazines tell us to be freaks in the sheets….just to have a book tell us that the male ego can’t stomach the idea of his woman having had practice sexually before meeting him, thus making you undateable. I say….MAN THE HELL UP!  But those words wont get you into a meaningful relationship. So, I say….think like a hoe, but act like a lady.

        Popular belief would mix and match that very theory…. and I am highly aware that I did not just reinvent the atom here, but work with a sister will you. The reason women don’t really get along with one another is because of two very simple reasons:

1. She was once naive and some more experienced girl came along and blew her dreams out of the water and now she is weary of every female; Good Girl Gone Bad Syndrome

2. She was the loose girl in the group who would do what the others wouldnt but always couldn’t get the guy or the relationships that the others could; Hoe Gone Remorseful Syndrome.

        The reason why I don’t leave a female, even a friend, around my good man is because…”if the woman thought anything like I had to in order to get him…” , I’d have to kill her. Women are ruthless. They say that men are hunters by nature. Cute. We sent you all out into the woods while we hunted out which route we would take to capture you. We are architects of manipulation, sorry…but we are. Why do you think it takes us so long to get dressed? Even our outfits are battle gear preparing us to go out on the battlefield and attack the enemy in order for us to win the war. Make-up;war paint. Heels; couture army boots. Girdles, push-up bras, and spanks; camoflauge! lmao!!!!! Women, since the beginning of time, have been the baited traps that the guys fall for, and yet somewhere they thought that they were catching us when we were catching them….if I ruined anyone’s idea of this set up….my bad, your fault (stole that from my brother…lol. Thanks, Dre)

        Yes, Biblically speaking you are supposed to wait to be found…..but it is where you place yourself and how you behave that will get you found. CHURCH IS NOT THE PLACE TO BE FOUND!!!! Girl, people are supposed to be finding Jesus and not your cooking skills at the annual bake sale for choir robes. Clubs are not the place to be found. Between the Ciroc and dim lights, you have to wonder if his judgment is just in picking you. You can still follow the old adage of being found, but having control in how you are found. Notice I said how… not when… don’t hit me up complaining that you havent been found yet. That’s a personal problem.

        Athletic and Celebrity groupies have the right idea, but wrong execution. They hang out after all events, creep up to the hotel rooms, and try to get pregnant just to stake claim to the fortune of a celebrity. Some are successful but even then many never make it past the baby mama and jump off stage. Then you have the ladies who dress appropriately but shut out every single guy who doesn’t fit her criteria…..wrong idea, semi right execution. I say wrong idea is because you are supposed to experiment, find out what it is that you really like, plus experience REALISTICALLY what the world is willing to give back to you. The semi-right execution is in being honest with what you will and wont take and moving on to the next one if it doesn’t work out. So what would happen if we mixed the two? Maybe then we would get the girl who would place herself in intellectual settings, dressed appropriate, not allowing herself to be objectified while still maintaining her game face. Thinking like a hoe , but acting like a lady.

        I could be wrong, I doubt it…and again I know that I am not saying anything new. But honestly…. this technique needs to be used. Have that “larger than life” appeal about you that the groupies have, but then execute your approach like a deaconess and watch the guys become baffled over the fact that they cant figure out how to get you. They say they don’t like game… BULL….because as soon as you admit how you really feel they think that the chase is over and they retreat like soldiers on the outside of the Trojan horse. I think that I can appropriately call this the Lysistrata Movement. Or as Medea would say it, “Clink, Clink”. lol.

        As women, we have the urge to be sensual and sexual, men are not the only ones, but we must learn how to control that urge and remain ladies in trying to reach that ultimate relationship with a guy. Protecting his frail ego and our reputation go hand in hand…and once you forget one you lose the other as well. It is a balancing act that we must always keep in our heads. It must whisper to you like your bladder right before you get on a roller coaster.

        But then again….I’m single….so I may not know what I am talking about… but all of my friends’ boyfriends love the way that I calm down their women and get the ladies to see things from his perspective. So, there is that to think about too…..it is always the single woman who gets the man…hint hint. So maybe it wouldn’t hurt to listen to one in order to keep him. Just a thought. *Wink*

Sincerely,

~*My Mother’s Daughter*~

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