Just ready to see this week’s episode… nothing special to say before hand.
Take 2 in 5, 4, 3, 2, 2, 2, 2, #ALLWHITEDiamonds
I simply LOVE watching Lisa Raye in the kitchen with her mother!!! Those are moments that I wish that I could have had with my mother, so I am more than jealous. *Sigh* Wait til you all read my book when it gets finished.
I simply, Simply LOVE the t-shirt that they gave her for her birthday that said “My friends call me Lisa Raye” LMAO!!!! I simply AGREE with Lisa Raye about the black attributes that people only applaud when someone else has it. She mentioned Bo Derrick’s braids and she mentioned Kim Kardashian’s ass. Yeh, it only becomes a big deal when people do what we have done for centuries and what we do/have naturally…. but PLEASE don’t get me started on this. The next time I see a KKK member… I’m gonna wish him skin cancer as he tries to get my natural melanin….lol.
Sidebar: Okay, so this whole “Stacy lost Lisa Raye’s Louis luggage” thing is getting on my GOT DAMN NERVE! Okay, let me put this in perspective. Rewind with me now. The first episode, Lisa Raye asked if the airline had lost Stacy’s luggage and then made the remark ” Let me not put that in the universe. But at least I’ve got mine”. I’m begging you, watch the reruns with me, Lisa Raye is HOLDING HER OWN LUGGAGE while she makes that statement and she is talking about celebrities showing up in town at airports. Now, as fans are requesting pictures and autographs, clear as day, the cameraman catches a glimpse of Lisa Raye walking away from her bag and it is in every shot in the background as she takes pics with fans. You can see the luggage behind them unattended. LISA RAYE walked off from her own bag. And I must make the connection to the episode with her make-up artist, where she offered to carry her make-up artist’s bags for her. So you can carry someone else’s bags but you cannot carry your OWN and then you get made because someone else didn’t check YOU for your OWN bag? Get out of here on that. So, be grown, and carry your own shit!
But at least I am glad that Lisa Raye and Stacy got over it and that they have moved on from this. It was a learning experience
Wait… did Quincy just say that he has Herpes Complex 10 because Lisa Raye kissed him? LMAO! I love that man! Lawd knows that I do!. And Lisa Raye said hat they fight like cats and cats.
But wow!! Lisa is 43 and truth be told…. she doesn’t look a day over 29. And I am not trying to gas her up…. but truth be told. I need to het on my Lisa Raye game…lol.
Jemisha’s (sp) fundraiser was a very WONDERFUL idea. But wait, what kind of treatment is going to be performed for her Sarcoma Cancer(sp) that could help Jemisha that she can only get in Germany? I will continue to send prayers in her direction. I wish that there was a website that we could go to so that us regular people could send money to support Jemisha. I want to support and send funding support DIRECTLY to her. Will inquire as to where I can do that. I mean, a sister aint balling outside of a budget, but every little bit counts and I think that I could skip a few meals to make sure she has a fight chance. What? SHut up… you would get sentimental too if you were human. I just don’t dog people out via my blog and in real life all the damn time. I have a heart….and I want to help. So, get ya game up and help too.
I LOVE Jemisha’s look that she is rocking for her fundraiser. JUST GORGEOUS!!!!! Yummy… DeRay Davis. I have some back story on that man there! lol Don’t worry… nothing scandalous, just a story on how I first met him while I was at Auburn University…but I digress. Glad that he is hosting this fundraiser with Lisa Raye. ANd the man who gave $200 is fine as hellllllllll………. NAWL!!! Elise Neal is in a girl group called Elise & Assorted Flavors? Okay, maybe I would have has to hear that in real-time. Or replay. Ummmmm…yeh. Okay, this comedian, Donovan, talking about the lace fronts is funny. He can stay.
AHAHAHAHAHAHA! They didn’t have to clown dude that they called Hustle Simmons. lmao! But he did look like how Russel would look if he were tall and fine. What? I’m just saying. Damn, Brooke Valentine?!!!! Where has she been? Girl Fight was my joint back in the day; that and MisBehavin’s Beat that Bitch with a Bottle. Okay… Ummm I should have been paying attention to KD/Katy Aubert or whoever that was, but I was so distracted by the cameraman all up in her crotch!
WOW!!! Management is paying for Jemisha’s flight over to Germany. Man, I really feel like I should do something. This is just beautiful. Dont ever let it be said that black people can’t get together for a cause without being arrested or shot 9 times. We have our moments,and this was a moment to be proud of! I salute Jemisha!
Okay, so they did give a link where we could donate to the cause for Jemisha if we so choose. The link is: www.JemsLifeForASPS.org
All jokes, and freedom of speech aside, I am making a vow to go and donate SOMETHING to this cause. If you do nothing else…..please go make a donation. Hell, you all don’t leave comments below so you can use that time to go make a donation. And no, I don’t know her….and I don’t have to know that I want to help.
Next Week: HOLD THE HELL UP!!!!!! Is my husband on next week’s episode! Yes, you didn’t know. I am married to Chef G Garvin in my head. And no… it is not my inner fat girl speaking…. this is my Southern woman recognizing a beautifully crafted and talented gentleman!!! Lawd have mercy!!! See y’all next week…lol
So, last week I loved the show and I still love the show….but I caught some discrepancies and had to call them out. So I recognized Willie from BET’s College Hill and the girl he was with was suppose to be his wife. Well……it is an entire week later and the thread just keeps on unraveling. The girl who was with Willie portraying his wife was named Cecily. As luck would have it… I am watching Elgin Charles’ show onVh1 called Beverly Hills Fabulous when in walks this woman named Cecily. SMDH. I was staring at her like, where do I know her from? Her face looks oddly familiar. And then Sean, the hairstylist says, “My client, Cecily, is a matchmaker.” DING! Woman, weren’t you on Sinbad’s show It’s Just Family last week? Damn, she gets around! But I can’t knock her hustle…just need them to spread out their reality show appearances more than they are currently exercising.
Take 2 in 5, 4, 3, 2, 2, 2, #LaughDamnIt
Hmmmm… just watched the intro. I wonder what size Paige wears? Because I want to become a shoe buddy and borrow her shoes. They are always so cute!!!!
Okay, soooo Scott, Sinbad’s agent….hmmm. So, do all actors have to get a physical in order to be considered to work? Then WTF kind of physical did Charlie Sheen have to take? lmao!
LMAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! So Scott asked if Sinbad wanted a male or a female physician to come and check him for a physical and Sinbad replied, “It doesn’t matter; female.” lmao!!! Classic! And Sinbad told the physician to lie to his family about his blood preassure…lmao! But in all honesty, I need to look more into my own blood pressure.
LMAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!! And Sinbad said, “Since this is a woman’s network, I think that I should get a pap smear on a regular basis……even though I dont even have a pap.” LMAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Where was this man found?!!!!!!!!!!!!! LMAO!!!!!!!!!!!!! I’m gonna get fired!!! I think that was the joke of the century!!!!!!!!!!! hahahahahahahah!
I’m about to go to the grocery store in just a minute…. they are making me feel bad!!! *eats Jelly Belly*
Wait? There is a HOME prostate check? Yes, I too would be mortified like Paige if my father asked me to help him with a home prostate exam. lmao! Sinbad asked them to look at his fingernails and asked if he could hurt himself. lmao!!! LMAO!! Meredith is hilarious during this whole thing as well. The whole ” lubricate your area” conversation is enough to get me fired. LMAO!!! The conversation with Sinbad saying he can’t find it…. smdh! LMAO!!! I’m done.. I can’t laugh any harder…lmao!
Ummmmmm I’m trying to remain holy while I watch Royce beat this dude up… but forgive me Father, for I continue to sin. *rewinds* Yep, still sinning.In all honesty, he is really good at this martial arts and combat execution. I wonder if he needs a combat partner. *Raises hand and falls on mat*
Sidebar: I wonder how many track suits does Sinbad own?
And Royce is even sexier without the glasses…..correction….a different kind of sexy.
WOW! This acupuncturist has Sinbad’s face looking like dude off of Hell Raiser….that was the movie with the dude with all of the needles in his face, right? And the scene where the chiropractor is adjusting his spine cracks me up. It looks like we walked on a Cinemax late night special called Sinbad, Paulo & a chiro table. lol.
LMAO!!!! Sinbad said that the secret to healthy eating as you get older is “If it tastes good, spit it out” lmao! I love this man.
Wait….. chef Same Bell walked into the room and I damn near forgot about Royce until they zoomed in on him eating an apple on the counter. The chef is one fine piece of beautiful man candy. AND he can cook!!!!!!!!!!!!! Royce, honey…. I don’t think that you and I are working out. I think we need some time apart… at least to the end of this chef’s segment and then we can try to work out our difference.
Man, when Chef Bell threw away all of that food… my inner fat chick cried. I think I will have to eat a chicken wing in honor of all that wasted food…lol.
LMAO! The body builder prayer…lmao!
I LOVE watching Meredith actually keep up with Regina the fitness trainer. I want to be fit like Meredith when get to be her age…..whatever it is because I can’t tell… she looks amazing. Remember people, black doesn’t crack! But Sinbad cracked me up when he said ” don’t let the kids know we hurt” as they were leaving to hip hop class…lol.
Yeh…. this show is a keeper. You laugh, you learn, and you witness a family. I read a caption earlier where someone called Sinbad’s family the New Cosby Show. I have to agree.So thank you for making us laugh….laughter is good for your health too.
What is up with Cash’s obsession with Star Wars? And really? Josh has lesbian astronauts as parents.
Bwahahahahahaha The way that Cash said I love you to the asian, pardon my lack of her name, but it was funny. And he lives with his mom?
Wait… So if….. DAMN! *choke on water* Cash beat me to it! lmao! The White on White on White painting is worth 10 million dollars. But Cash said, “If it was called Black on Black On Black it would be worthless; social commentary.” hahahahahahahaha That damn near beat “Cover your mouth, Bitch!”…lmao.
Why does Dutch have a tattoo of Tattoo?
Okay, so the point of this episode is that Oz is the reason why Melanie’s dad, Larry, went to jail. And so he felt bad and gave Melanie a job. So, BWAHAHAHAH! I keep trying to write something clever and they make me laugh. Oz did NOT just put the sleeper grip on Cash. And when he patted him as he walked away…he was pretty close to Lil Cash.
Ummmm why did Cash come to the meeting and say “What’s up my Whookies?” And WHY is he calling himself Leroy Jenkins in the Nerf war?
LMAO! And ewwwwww the kiss on the Star Wars re-enactment…just wrong.
Okay, sooooo Larry overrode (ummm is that grammatically correct?) the alarm floor grid before Cameron and Oz could get the White on White on White ( subconsciously sings Racks on Racks on Racks) painting off the wall. But ummmmm So is Larry a Hacker too? I’m confused. But I will allow confusion. Because this episode brought back the funny. SO who has the rights to the job at the Culver Arts Museum.
WOW!!! So Melanie’s dad made a deal to get the painting if he would stay out of Melanie’s life? WOW!!! But it was sweet of Oz the way that he took care of her. Sweeeeet.
Next week: All I can say is… Josh as an Avatar? LMAO!!!!!
Yes, I know… I posted this late. I was extremely tired last night, set my DVR and woke up this morning…13 hours later. lol. So… my deepest apologies for those of you who faithfully hit me up at midnight asking when I will post my blogs. You are appreciated!
Take 2 in 5, 4, 3, 2, 2, 2, 22, #KillTamar
First off HAPPY BIRTHDAY, TONI ( mega late… but go with the spirit) Secondly… I love the intro to the show. I never really paid close attention to it than what I just did. I looooooove it. If it were a full song, I would play it all the time. I wish she could reuse the beat and do a song with it too.
Wait… did Tamar’s ass just call Toni the “Fun Police”? Come on. People are just different. There are places that I would not want to do for my birthday. And I love how Toni called her out about being “New Money”. Yes, it is soooo evident that Tamar is full of ignant New Money ideas and activities. She should listen to Toni…no offense… but Toni has filed for bankruptcy TWICE, right? And lawd!!! Did Vincent really give Tamar his card? I want to do an intervention on Vincent.
Sidebar: Vincent, honey. I have no clue what it is that you see in Tamar, but from what I am seeing, honey…..you need a better and more appreciative woman. I mean, really? Is this just an act or is she this way all of the damn time? I cant stomach it. I really want to find a wman who is appreciative and deserving of a good man like Vincent.
And the yacht that Tamar got was nice… but it was a little over the top. But again… she is NEW MONEY. And Tamar roasting Toni…lmao! PRICELESS AND ON POINT!!! Lmao! OKAY… Tamar made a funny. I can give her that.
I am in LOVE with those Sex in the City sunglasses. The Carry Bradshaw shades are on point!
Wait…. Did they just say that Trina doesn’t have any sexual inhibitions out of the blue?!!! I didn’t even see the transition. LMAO!!! Trina said that she is Try-sexual…lmao! WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAIT!!! Trina took down her panties to show someone how to masturbate? LMAO!!!! That is funny amongst all funny.
LMAO!!! She said that you need to role play… and Tamar said, “Pretend what? That your husband doesn’t cheat?” LMAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Traci and this whole “knock boots with your mother in the house. You cant even bust a good nut.” statement had me about to get fired. Lmao! And when Traci did the Legally Blonde “Lean & Snap” cracked me up! But I am not mad at them! Keep it going ladies! Women should be more liberal in their sex lives and be proud of expressing their wants and needs.
So LIV nightclub….I have to remember to go there next time I am inMiami. And awwww Toni is in the room. I love how she stuck to her guns. If she didn’t feel like going out…. Don’t go out. This world is about our wants and needs. I love how Toni has her own mind and she sticks to it. BEAUTIFUL!!! But it was comical how they went from the club and then did a slowed down record sound when they flashed back to Toni in the hotel room. But I don’t understand why Traci was unable to go out.
GENIUS!!!! I love how Toni said “ I don’t do sequels” when Tamar requested that she date an ex-boyfriend….lol. MY SENTIMENTS EXACTLY! I’m procrastinating accepting a friend request on Facebook from an ex at this very moment….lol.
Traci saying that Tamar has more houses than she has shoes….lol. Again, I don’t have millions, so I don’t understand it….but more than 4 houses is a bit too much. Wait… did this woman just say that it has 9.5 bathrooms? Who has to shit that much!!! And 7 bedrooms? SMDH.
Ummm… is the perfume called Booty Crack and Don’t Get me Wrong I don’t Swallow?….smdh.
I love how Traci is able to let Toni’s success be hers to enjoy. I feel some kind of way about Trina and Tamar saying that they will always be Toni’s Sisters. Well, boo…. Step ya game up. It is very selfish because Toni congratulates you all, from what I can see….on all of your accomplishments. You should NOT make her feel bad about it. Because something that you all have is because of HER! So Tamar, you wouldn’t have yoru husband if it wasn’t for Toni’s success. We wouldn’t even know you if it wasn’t for Toni. PERIOD! So, get over it.
I love how Vincent said, “We’re not ready for kids right now, we have Tamar” lmao! And I read a blog earlier this morning, and I agree with one of the comments…I think that Tamar wans to have children, but Tamar just doesn’t want one with Vincent. And really…. Tamar, the WORLD is giving you the “shut up” face.
HOLD THE FUCK UP!!! For Tamar to role call on her sisters and their men… I would have punched that bitch in her face. She is sooooo wrong for that. They let that selfish, bad weave wearing, high pitched, fish face, ghetto bitch get away with that. I wish a mother fucker would!!!! And her spending 3 thousand dollars on SHADES!!!! Shoot me now.
And yes, Vince… put your feet down and let her know that she is wasting YOUR money. And he told her that she does a lot of talking and not enough listening. PREACH!!!PUT HER ON BLAST!!! Tamar, I don’t want her to say shit else until she signs that contract paperwork that Vincent gave her to get her record ready. Put up… or Shut up. Point. Blank. Period.
I am in LOVE with this look that Toni has while she is sitting on the couch when Towanda comes over to discuss a blind date for Toni. She looks so naturally beautiful. I tell yall… black doesn’t crack! WAIT!!! Lmao! Is Toni really looking for a Rabbit vibrator?!!!!!!!!! Lmao! I cant write this while at work! Hahahahahahahahahahahahaha. #dead!
Next week: The clip is so vague that I cant tell you what it is about…. But, I do know that I will be watching. Yeh buddy!
Okay, you all should already know that I am on pins and needles to write about this show. Today has proven to be a good day in the first place. First…. I freed up some space in my daily planner, watched some people act unprofessional in the wake of that decision…and then I purchased a Nook. Yes, a Nook! Forget the ignant (yes, ignant) sons of bitches in the day…the Nook took the cake. And then I hosted a poetry open mic that had the best audience ever!!! I mean, I have been blessed with the best audiences lately…but I digress.
Okay… too much excitement going on in the course of my day to recap you, so you will have to click the links above. Let’s get to the goods!
Take 2 in 5, 4, 3, 2, 2, 2, #Proposal
So, I must confess in my rather sober state….Chrissy is slowly growing on me. But dont repeat it. This is between you and I…okay.
DAMN!!!!! Mama Jones’ face just hit the floor with that proposal. If I could film Nancy’s face…. I would sell it on eBay. Awwwwwww but Jim said yeh!!!! Awwww, my heart goes out to him and Chrissy. He is such a man’s man. And yes…. I agree with Chrissy, “what the fuck does ‘I’m witchu’ mean?” Jimmy… you didn’t say yes you will marry her. But I disagree with Chrissy, I will wait for my guy to propose to me. I’ll never propose to a guy.
And why is it that Nancy is punking everyone? How come no one can hold her back? She weighs all of 2 nuts sacks and a crack pipe…but no one can control or block her? LMAO!!! That was just funny to watch. And Nancy, with all due respect…parents arent always told, they are sometimes surprised like everyone else. And the only time the parents are told is if the son is asking for the daughter’s hand in marriage. This is unconventional, hence the unconventional method of not telling the parent.
LMAO! Jimmy said “I’m still here. My clothes are still upstairs” lmao! I like the way he thinks. He put Chrissy’s complaining in perspective. And then…. CHRISSY!!!!! Chrissy, boo, don’t give a man an ultimatum. YOU proposed to HIM!!! If he would have said no in front of everyone you would have been hurt and embarrassed. So he saved face and then you need to wait and give him time to accept what you placed on his table. Dont rush it now.
Now….First off, last time we heard Somaya’s song, it wasnt finished…and now she somehow found the money to do a video? Who is funding this? Not to be all up in her purse straps like that, but is she still sleeping in the loft above the studio? And wow… Emily just can’t get enough of the drama…. I would have stayed away from Somaya. Point. Blank. Period. And yeh, this whole entire going on the internet to start a beef. Be the bigger woman, take the higher road and let the shit be. I hate simple-minded females who wont accept that they were wrong, and they get a whole bunch of other simple minded females to back them up. Grow up!!!!! That’s about a stupid as people writing subliminal Facebook statuses about people they are mad about…lol. When you are right, you live with that. You let the hater shit roll off your back and you keep it going. Only basic bitches harbor on that stuff. It is quite comical if you ask me. But…..I digress.
And JIM AND THIS NEW SONG…… PRICELESS!!! This song about Chrissy is amazing!!! And the way that Jim confesses his love on National TV…. I continue to applaud him for being a man. I can not say that enough.
Wow!!! Fabolous didn’t even want to be in the family portrait with them just because the cameras were going to be around. And I am not going to talk about anyone’s kid…but her son is in need of a time out. And Fab didn’t even pick up the phone when she called? Wow….. I want to sympathize with her because her home life isn’t the prettiest…or at least that is how it is portrayed…but I have a problem with women who just wont get up and leave. Not to compare, but I will….Jim kisses, loves, and confesses his love for Chrissy in damn near EVERY episode of this show. His boys may pick on him, Olivia may joke, but that doesn’t make Jim any less of a man. Hell, it makes him sexy as hell and a model for what real men should do when they are in love. So, if Fab loves Emily… why can’t he step out into the light and claim his family? I really have a problem with this Skeletor looking motherfucker right now. I will send prayers of strength out to Emily, because no one deserves to be treated like that. She better start raising her Kelly Pitts emergency funds.
Okay, so I know that Rich is upset….but for a man to go off on a woman for ANY reason….you are not a man. Again….Rich, with your trying to be hard as hell bullshit….let it go. You are feeding into this. The fact that you are getting upset about a no name wanna be rapper is proving that she has the power to get under your skin. POW! She wins!!! Grow the fuck up. Again, this mess drives me nuts. Punk asses! Yeh… I said it, let the shit go. And I’m done.
Yeh, so with this falling on the same night & time as The Braxtonsand Sinbad, I don’t know how much longer I can blog about this show. What is their relevance to our society other than the fact that she use to be Lil Wayne’s wife, and will always be the mother of his child? *Sigh* The entertainment side of me says that I should continue to blog to stay up on current “what’s happenings” but then the logical side of me say “Bitch, you really don’t give a damn for these people outside of the fact that they are human and you want to see everyone do well for themselves. ” *inhale*. So yeh, we will see how long I blog about this one too. I hope y’all don’t expect this one to be on time… like the day after it airs… not gonna happen, boo boo.
Take 2 in 5, 4, 3, 2, 2, 2, 2, #AndWeCareB/c?
Okay, Yes, I am late on this too. Too much comes on television in the same night for me to remember what it is that I was suppose to blog about. Also, they come on at the same time. So work with a sister.
Basically, this episode was more about Anita going to rehab than anything else. To hear what she went through as a child that caused her to begin drugs actually made me sympathize with her. My biological father was/is on drugs and I don’t connect her struggle with his, but I do understand the connection between the abuse and the addiction.
Memphitz (sp)….Toya’s man…. does he have a brother? lol. I mean really, that is a man there. I am so happy for Toya in that aspect of her life. We need to see more men like him not afraid to tell their women ( with the world watching) how much they care about them and want them in their lives. I think that makes him a man right down to his core. Most guys wouldn’t do what he does when the cameras are not around and they definitely wouldn’t do what he does when the cameras are around, so BRAVO to a good black man.
The rest of Toya’s family is constantly working on trying to get their connection together. I just found out that Toya has a baby sister….who knew? But she is trying to be a role model for her and I applaud that. I know that they will all work it out. I am just trying to figure out what I am suppose to be learning through my blogging of the show. Are any of you even reading this particular blog post? Let me know in the comment section.
Sorry I cant remember much else to blog about, but that is all that I can remember.
So, last week was one of those shows where I had to face what was going on in my life as I blogged. Yes, it is hard to know that I am in the same boat as a woman who is beautiful as hell….and know that she will get a relationship before me. And not to mention that the entire week was filled with a ton of relationship challenges….the guys that I came in contact with last week challenged me to the core.
With all of that being said…. I hope that this week’s episode does NOT make me look inside of myself. Well, let’s go.
Take 2 in 5, 4, 3, 2, 2, 2, 2, #Diamond
I know that I just said Take 2 above…..but that was Thursday when I thought I was ready to write this. So, to say that I am late in writing this would be an understatement. I am sooooooooo sick that it is not even funny. I hate spring and I hate that if I think about getting sick…..I am down for 3 weeks. So, to everyone who was looking for this to be posted on Friday, my deepest apologies. Please know that I have been well medicated, dehydrated, and plain knocked the hell out and preparing for Easter Sunday. I would have rather been writing this.
Now that it is Sunday and I just woke up from a coma after church at 10pm after only an hour or so of sleep from last night…yadda yadda, yadda….I figured I could write this before The Borgias came on.
Take 2 (Literally) in 5, 4, 3, 2, 2, 2, 2, #AllWhite
Okay, so Lisa Raye is running her first 5k marathon for the Susan G Komen: Race for the Cure. Hmmm…. I will take Lisa Raye’s cue and I will begin to condition myself to run my first 5k marathon all the way through by spring races in 2012. I think that is a believable time frame, right? And so does her trainer not have a last name?
Okay, so remember the cousin that lost the suitcase? Isnt that her assistant? Why have we not seen her since they have returned from Puerto Rico? Did she fire the poor girl? And truth be told….. karma is a bitch. Because watching all of those reruns of that episode Lisa Raye did joke about her cousin losing her bag and boasting about how she had hers. And in several shots when the fans are taking pics….the Louis V suitcase is visibly in the background, and not even Lisa Raye is near the bag, but….I digress.
Now, on to this new stylist. Wait, back up. Joe eXclusive……I don’t know if his outer appearance would have made me trust him enough to even give him an opportunity to dress me, but I guess I could learn not to judge a bargain basement book by its cover. What? You thought that just because it was Easter that I would be easy on him? BWAHAHAHAHAHAH! You know better. Okay, back to this new stylist. Her name is Okera. She pronounces is Oh-k-ear-ah. Cute. Too close to okra to keep my humor in tact. BUUUUUUUT!
I love her mother’s house….the little bit that we got to see. And the dog, Diamond…is so cute. Now, if i could get my dog, Stanely Blu to give a high-five he will be the coolest dog in the neighborhood…lol. Right now he’s smart, but too smart for his own good…lol. Wow… how about I am just now learning about Circle of Promise….wait, no, I take that back. I remember Gabrielle Union mentioned it on The Mo’Nique Show. My Aunt Sharon, is a survivor of breast cancer… so to watch this episode hits home for me, too. Now, Lisa Raye putting on make-up to run a race continues to remind me that there will be something that I dont understand about her in every episode….lol. I guess it is a celebrity thing. But I do see Lisa Raye caring for her make-up artist touched me so very much. THAT is not a celebrity thing, that is a human thing. Those are moments that I love to see in Lisa Raye.
Man, I am watching them run and I am wondering….why are they running so damn fast!!! Slow it down people… I am getting tired just watching them. I would do what I call the “fat girl shuffle”, that’s more of an accelerate walk …less of a jog yet more than a walk. But I applaud her for her effort. Lawd….did I promise to be able to do that by next Spring? YEA!!!!!!!!! Lisa Raye finished the race!!!!!!!! That really touched me. Okay… so yes, I can do it! Well… I learned a ton from this episode….can’t wait for the next.
Today is Easter Sunday….I wonder what debauchery will be brought forth in this episode. Hmmm…whatever it is, I pray that it is worth asking for forgiveness.
Take 2 in 5, 4, 3, 2, 2, 2,2 #Crime, #Family, #Murder, #Amen
WOW!!! How creepy to have Lucrezia come out of the water that way, all pale and float into the painting in the ceiling!!!!!!! PERFECT ENTRANCE AND BRAVO TO THE CINEMATOGAPHER & DIRECTOR!!!!
I still feel terrible for Lucrezia and the man she was forced to marry. Shame! I know for a fact that I was born in a time where I too am given to option to love the man I marry. Who would have thought this would have ever been a perfect choice for her. Shame on her father! That last episode and every scene with Lucrezia and her husband Swartza….still bring emotions for me. Great job on the writers!
Now, Cesare and this woman who he met at his sister’s wedding….wow! Dudes back then could meet a woman from a dance, catch feelings and be ready to kill for her? Where did that part of the male chivalry and romance go?….lol. So this woman is married and yet, that does not stop Cesare from wanting her. And of course Cesare’s mother brings forth the idea that he could leave the church to have a life with this woman if he so dared. Wow…. Cesare told the woman that he would put her heart “in fear of its life, but he would never harm it.” WHO WROTE THAT?!!! I need to follow them around to obtain such genius.
I need for them to speak more clearly!!!! I just missed a very important line due to mumbling!!! Something about threatening Lucrezia’s husband with some kind of possibility. It would have to deal with Giovanni Swartza’s nephew, i suppose.
Rovere is spending all of this time traveling; first Naples, then Florence, and now Milan? Oh wait…..so it was not Lucrezia’s husband (Swartza) that the Pope spoke of…but his cousin is Giovanni Swartza. But wait… did he (Giovanni) just pee through the floor onto his nephew for him to drink? EWWWWW! But at what point was Rovere fulfilling his cardinal duties?
And I must find out more about this Machiavelli from Florence; the same who spoke with Rovere and now seeks out Cesare. Wow… the clever wordplay of this episode is enough to make me touch myself……like watching this guy take baths as Lucrezia watches. Oh…so the handsome servant is Paulo. Hmmmmm…lol
LMAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!! The revealing for the portrait for Princess Silvia from Navarre(sp) almost had me choke on my Sauvignon Blanc…lol. Juan’s face was simply priceless….lol.
But help me understand, is Lucrezia so longing for companionship that after being practically raped she is so connected to the servant, Paulo? But I guess some victims behave differently. But brilliant to have Paulo mess with Swartza’s saddle to make him fall.
LMAO!!!!!! So the Cardinal (Swartza) was caught with his cousin, twice removed Jerry Lee Lewis style, leaving his room with sexual purposes floating in the air when the pope walks in. Funny how the pope said, “I would hope more than twice removed”. And his going to Milan killed the Duke that was chained in the floor, the nephew. Wow…..thsoe people had not a care in the world.
I quote “Now my best would break your promise, Borgia” . Even the Assassin is a poet, I see.
Wait… does the pope carry a flask? Ummmm….so communion is a daily ritual for His Holiness? lol. *takes a sip*
Damn, Cesare…… a dude disrespected your mother and you killed the Barron? Remind me not to say anything about your mother, Vannozza(sp).
So, Swartza did fall off of his horse and broke his leg… back then that could almost be deadly if not set correctly. But I think that this should be a warning to the heads of households who do not properly treat those who support them. I make a personal reference on that sentiment. Oh, what I would give to return to 1492………And Scene.
I must confess… it becomes harder and harder for me to blog about this show in my original format. I get so caught up in trying to watch the show that I actually forget that I am supposed to be blogging. I find that I have to watch the show once through to gain the concept and string of events and then I must come back and watch it again to blog uninterrupted. And with an hour-long show, I find that to be too much of my already limited time. So, we will see if this stays as a part of my blog list.
I really want it to stay, really, I do. lol
Take 2 in 5, 4, 3, 2, 2, 2, 2,2 #Crime, Family, Murder, Amen
So this episode,Lucrezia’s Wedding, starts off with a beautiful scenery of Florence and Cardinal Della Rovere riding into the city walls. Some man of the cloth, unknown at the moment but bares a close resemblance to Uncle Fester, is hailing from the pulpit how Pope Alexander (Borgia) is an abomination to the church. Such strong words, don’t you think? But I just know that this is right up Cardinal Rovere’s ally.
Lucrezia is seen in bed sick, from incest maybe…but at the moment I am unsure. Cesare is seen taking care of his beloved sister. If this is cold feet…. I want hot feet;she seems to be breaking a sweat from a fever. Waiiiiit, is she upset at the horrible death of Jem? She mentions that she shall never have another friend like “him”. HOW DARE CESARE LIE!!! He told Lucrezia that Jem died from swamp fever. I have seen a moor die from many a things, but seldom a mosquito bite! And yes, I am still upset about the manner in which they killed him in the last episode. And sure, I know that they took creative liberties with the script and who knows, maybe Jem never asked to switch over to Christianity… but if he did…. I have a good feeling I know where the Borgias currently reside. Hell, even if he remained a Muslim and they killed him I know that I could ask Lucifer to give a Borgia a finger after passing the salt at the dinner table. but I digress.
The scene with the pope and his wife or was she just his long-term mistress too? Whoever she is, there scene together is one that brought forth so much information. The pope has banned Lucrezia’s mother (Vannozza dei Cattani) from attending the wedding as not to bring forth any form of scandal. As legend has it, Rodrigo’s wife is rumored to have been a courtesan. Hmmm… so she was good enough to wife, have children, but not good enough to attend the pope’s daughter’s wedding? Confusion. Speak of scandal. *southern Baptist church fan, leans in pew to spread the news*
Cesare, the lying bastard, meets with the Assassin (Micheletto) and a hooded mystery man who looks more like the apothecary from Romeo & Juliet or the hooded MJ upon entry from Remember the Times. Cesare asks, “What is he? Benedictine or Franciscan?” Hmmm… *google search*
From what I can gather, both groups were banned for one reason or another and its Catholic members were placed into exile. Will do more research to find how that is relevant to this time frame, but as it stands…there is your answer. Or my answer since I asked. lol.
So, the Assassin has brought him to see Cesare. When asked the aforementioned question, Micheletto mentions that he is of some “order” …one of which diction would have been helpful to clarify. But, since Cesare mentions his “begging bowl” one would rely on history to know that is a Buddhist term. Anywho, Cesare mentions that he can go to Florence, probably to scope out dirt on Uncle Fester, and return it back to the Assassin. And again… I have no clue what the hooded man’s name is. I think he said John something, but I do know that he is at the eminent’s service…lmao. And the scars on his face may very well betray him as they did the Assassin in the salt baths.
The pope’s mistress and his daughter are still close; baffles me if that would EVER happen today. Lucrezia mentions that Jem still visits her in her dreams and Giulia Farnese tells her not to worry. And Lucrezia confesses that the Moor has a secret to tell her and that, in her dreams, she must kiss Jem to comfort him. She asks Giulia if it is permissible to kiss a Moor in her dreams to which she answers that everything is permissible in our dreams.
The scene where Giulia teaches Lucrezia about kissing reminds me of the park scene in Cruel Intentions. A “chaste kiss” is very innocent and full of promise. Then there is the “kiss of pleasure” which begins to promise. And the kissing lesson is broken…and Giulia leaks the secret of her mother not attending Lucrezia’s wedding. Upon inquiring the truth from the pope…he storms away without promising her of her mother’s attention.
Sidebar: I am only 13 minutes into the show! Packed with drama…..I must find a better way to describe this! BUT I LOVE THE SCANDAL!
LMAO!!! The theatre show is frigging hilarious! the woman on the floor cleaning with the man behind her simulating doggy style almost made me bite my tongue! I am sure doggy style has been around for ages, but so out in the open? Hmmmmm Nice to know.
And how sneaky of Cardinaly Rovere to request that Florence alow France to march through their city in order to invade Italy. I really must do research, but I don’t want to spoil the series.
Now, who is this Theo character? He said so much that I got even ore confused. Was he previously Vannozza dei Cattani’s lover? Waiiiiiiit, Theo is Vannozza’s husband/ I am so confused, then how is she in the Vatican with the pope? And why is Theo so afraid of Cesare? CONFUSION, CONFUSION, CONFUSION!!!!
Now Uncle Fester is scaring me with his description of his dream. he dreams of a cleric in red who will welcome a northern army ( France) to come and bring destruction to Rome. He even mentioned that the Borgia pope will be dead. I’ve always been wary of prophets…. but…continue.
And look… Christopher Columbus provides a savage for the Pope to look at. Are you going to kill this one like you did Jem? What? Just asking. lol.
How ironic that Cardinal Rovere can ask the question if it is a sin to spill blood for the greater good and to banish evil. I’m not calling out any religions….but I think you catch my drift. SMDH. And how could he not know that the supposed man of the cloth in the confessional is not a man of the cloth. Sure, only we would know it is the hooded man… but come on! Watch who you tell your business too. I am not telling a minister jack! This is why I have a direct line to the LAWD…..have mercy! The hooded man let it slip out and called him Cardinal. DAMN!!!! Cardinal Rovere just stabbed this son of a bitch in the eye. EWWWWWWWWWWWWW!
Okay…. the play and the vulgarity…flashing breasts…smh. I knew they went too far into the episode without sex. lol.
And boy, I damn near forgot that Joffre even existed. For a moment there I thought he was the Borgia version of the twins from Let’s Stay Together. lmao
Thanks the heavens above for the Americas! If it were up to the old country there would be no Bridezillas due to arranged marriages. How would I spend my Saturdays? But this wedding is gorgeous!The actress who plays Lucrezia is absolutely stunning. *Girl Crush*
How BOLD of the pope to parade his hoe. The nerve, I tell you! But even bolder is the courage of Cesare to bring his mother to the aftermath of the wedding in sheer defiance of the pope’s orders. Such a turn on. lol. But nothing beats the confusion that I have of such a vulgar play displayed for the POPE after a WEDDING. Say it with me now, CONFUSION!!!
But this bedroom scene between Lucrezia and Swartza(sp)…..NO!!! I am emotional over this. He called their wedding a farce! But to rape her! *sharpens my knife* THAT IS UNCALLED FOR! I never understood how guys could get so angry that they get turned on enough to get an erection. I must stop writing…..I am pissed, furious, and amazed by the cinematography and its ability to make me get this angry at what I just saw. Brava!
COVER YOUR MOUTH, BITCH!!!!! LMAO! Yep, still funny as hell.
So, last week was the funniest week in television for me. Breaking In is now one of my favorite shows to come home and blog about. This show will be one of those shows that will become one of those classics. And everyone who knows me knows….I dont give out a compliment so easily. So take it!
Well, I just woke up from a much needed nap. My body is falling apart from my failure to listen to it telling me that I need to take some things off of my plate. But, here I am, pillow faced and hot ass breath about to blog about this show. TMI? COVER YOUR MOUTH, BITCH! lol. I dont have to talk while I type, and I am laying back down as soon as it goes off….so, dont judge me. Enjoy!
Take 2 in 5, 4, 3, 2, 2, 2, 2 #5FingerDiscount !
LMAO!!! Wait… did Dutch just say he’s out like Michael Bolton? Funny. And he even makes Muppets for romantic gifts? lol.
And how do you fix a bathroom blow dryer that SUCKS IN your shirt right off your back? I thought it was called a BLOW dryer.
And really? Does a boss tell you to taze yourself in the faaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaLMAO!!!!! Josh just tazed himself in the face just because OZ told him to do so. LMAO!!Where they do that at? LMAO!! And really, Cameron? Did you just pull a Cable Guy and say “Get ‘er Done!” lmao! Sorry… that is still funny to me whether people still says it or not…lol.
LMAO!!! SO the point of this show is that a Nascar driver, Jimmy, comes to Contra_Security and informs them that during a previous race his head monitor to the tower was over powered by strange music. So, there is obviously a mole in this pit crew. Cash’s dumbass says “Well, as long as he doesnt have a mole on his lug nut.” lmao! What? It was no “cover yoru mouth, bitch” but I found it funny.
LMAO!!!! Wait…. so, apparently Breaking In is not beneath making Dick Cheney jokes referencing him shooting his friend in the face. Political humor makes me all tingly inside. So, are the writers Democrat? lmao I heard that Cheney was going to make a personal appearance but he just didnt have the “heart” to tell some of the tougher jokes. LMAO! I crack me up. & Fuck you if you didnt get that joke. Go read something that has pictures.
P.S. I’m gonna turn Dick Cheney into a verb. I think that it will make me sound extremely hood if I walk into the hood and pull a Nino Brown. I can see it now….”Sit your $5 ass down before I make change….or Dick Cheney your ass.” Yep….thugalicious!
Okay, I am NOT really feelings Cash’s role in this episode. He is suppose to be the token negro who makes me laugh. And although that would normally make my inner panther protest Faux (Fox), I really do miss it today. So…..what else is Cash going to fix that we will later find out that Oz is behind the magical printer that Cash thinks he has power over.
LMAO! Yeh, is this the episode where Cameron says out-of-date shit like “Fa Sho”? Yeh, non-ethnic people…dont try shit like that. by the time that you hear it and think to exercise it….it is no longer cool by its originators. Just an FYI. Nothing says “Late Motherfucker” than being the only ethnic diva at an Auburn Alumni football party and hearing my fellow graduates yelling DJ Khaled/T-Pain’s All I Do Is Win every time that Cam Newton does an awesome play. Okay…I digress, but my point still stands.
Ummmm….was Josh talking into a pen microphone. Why did he repeat syphilis? lmao! And WOW!!!! How in the world do you make Christmas in Central Park in someone’s house?!!! I mean the snow machine inside? But, romantically sentimental.
And yes. I called it. Cash has just been OZED. Yes, Oz is now a verb like Dick Cheney, except mine is cooler. And wowzers!!! Dutch has been hired full-time. Shame… I just want to cry for Cameron.
Okay, this Episode wasnt as funny as I would have liked. There was nothing extremely memorable about it. *Sigh* See, this is what happens when you give something new props so soon. Its as if the Universe sucks the power you thought that you had when giving a compliment. But, I have faith…it will be funny next week.
Episode 1: My Intro to Lisa Raye
~*2Deep*~ Uncensored! 